conflict resolution in problem solving

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13 Conflict Resolution and Problem Solving

Chapter 13 Check-in:

• Identify Conflict Causes and Effects
• Explore Conflict Approaches Solutions
• Basic Problem Solving Strategy PDCA

Like all communication, good conflict management and resolution requires your time: listen, reflect, and consider all elements of a situation and the people involved.  It is not a simple process and there are some steps to help you navigate the process.  In the end, it is about the relationship.

Frequently considered a negative, conflict can actually be an opportunity for growth in relationship or work.  Your attitude towards the situation and person plays a role in any outcome.  Adam Grant, Professor of Psychology at The Wharton School at the University of Pennsylvania and Saul P. Steinberg Professor of Management, notes that “The absence of conflict is not harmony, it’s apathy.  If you are in a group where people never disagree, the only way that could ever really happen is if the people don’t care enough to speak their minds.” (Grant, February 2021).

However, it is easy to feel at a loss in an immediate conflict situation.  Here are some brief points to consider when faced with more than just a disagreement.

Conflict is emotional: it is much greater than a difference of opinions.  It is usually an expression of not being heard, seen, valued or respected.   It is based on a deeply person need and emotional response, based on perceptions which have identified a threat in any form.  If conflict is ignored, it can fester and result in such entrenched opinions and sides that resolution appears impossible (Segal et al, 2020).

The first step is to determine what the actual problem is as perceived by all parties.  The Conflict Tree analogy is especially useful if you respond well to visuals (O’Connor, 2020).  It is an excellent activity for a group or individual to clarify the effects (branches), core problems (trunk), and even causes of the issue (roots).

Once the actual problem is identified, you can move on to tackling a resolution together.

Approaches to Conflict

There are generally five styles for approaching conflict (Benoliel, 2017) and understanding what they are and what style you lean towards, identifies how you will move through the process.  These categories are determined by whether the focus is on the relationship or the end goal of a task/project.  While these may be more specific to workplace conflicts, they certainly identify personal conflict responses as well.

Collaboration is marked by a balanced focus on the relationship with others and meeting long-term objectives.  A Competition style is marked by individuals who are assertive and probably uncooperative who demonstrate that their priority is the outcome of the project more than the relationships.  Although few people enjoy conflict, the Avoidance style focuses on the the immediate unpleasantness and therefore avoids the issues.  This traditionally marks individuals who are unassertive and uncooperative largely because they assume it is safer to ignore than face an issue.  Sometimes there are individuals who will do anything to please others: this Accommodation approach results in self-sacrifice and is usually the route taken by those who care more about the relationship than the outcome.  Unfortunately, they are frequently taken advantage of in their efforts to please others.  Lastly, there are those who prefer the Compromise strategy. This may seem expedient in the attempt to resolve the problem by aiming for mutually acceptable terms and concessions, it does frequently leaves no one side satisfied even though it allows most to maintain an assertive and cooperative stance.

Strategies for Solutions

Sometimes those involved in conflict turn to an third person for assistance to resolve a conflict.  A mediator can listen to the perspectives of those in the dispute and focuses on helping each side hear the concerns and priorities of the other.  Working with the individuals in conflict, a mediator aims to help them create a solution acceptable to both sides.  Sometimes the third party is an Arbitrator whose role is to hear each side and provide a decision to resolve the dispute.  In some cases the conflict results in the even more formal process of a trial.

There are four key skills you need to approach conflict resolution with or without a third party involved (Segal et al, 2020; Fighting Fair, n.d.).

Conflict can be a very stressful experience and your Stress Management is an essential first step.  When we are stressed, we can’t think clearly, we can’t understand someone else’s thoughts or feelings, and it makes communication very difficult.  Use whatever method works best for you to manage your stress.

Once your stress is managed, it is easier to exert Control over your Emotions.  Recognize the emotions you are experiencing to assist in your processing the experience without having a purely emotional response.

With your stress and emotions recognized and managed, it makes it easier to recognize and pay attention to the feelings you and the other people express  and you can Identify Non-Verbal Communication.   Much is said without words and body language is a good indication of how the other person feels towards the situation.

Respect each other is standard for every communication situation and essential to remember if you are in a position of conflict.  Personal attacks, or drawing on personal knowledge, has no productive part in conflict resolution.

Many resources may explain the benefits of humour, but caution should be used.  Sometimes an emotional situation is not the best time for humour as you can unintentionally be seen to diminish the importance another person places on the experience.

Work together to identify the problem by taking the time to see it from multiple perspectives.  Be clear about the desired results and end goal.  Think about the relationships and long term impacts that any course of action may have on all parties.  It takes commitment to resolve a conflict.

Problem Solving

We covered Reflection and Feedback in Chapter 12 and these are essential steps for effective conflict resolution and problem solving. Even the Trial and Error process of problem solving relies on evaluating the success of an action before moving on to another attempt.

Many different approaches to problem solving exist though the basic core approach can be seen across geographic and language borders.  The PDCA approach – Plan, Do, Check, Act – provides the basic four steps process that can be expanded to suit any profession or experience (Plan, Do, Check, Act, 2021).

Problem solving starts with a clear identification of problem.  Then you need to clarify the desired end result.  The development of a plan can be as short or as long as necessary.  Once you have a plan, you have to implement it: Do.  Check is your opportunity to evaluate the success of your plan and make any amendments necessary.  Finally, Act: put your strategy into practice.  An important point to remember is that the reflection and evaluation should be an ongoing part of the solution you implement.

Chapter 13 Check-out:

• Explore Conflict Approaches and Solutions

Remember your last conflict with another person.  How was it resolved?  How would you like it to have been resolved?  What could you have done to implement that change in result?

How do you usually approach problem solving?  How successful has it been for you? 

What, if anything, would you like to change about how you’ve problem solved in the past?

Resources and References

Benoliel, B. (2017). Five styles of conflict resolution.  Walden University.  [Online]  https://www.waldenu.edu/news-and-events/walden-news/2017/0530-whats-your-conflict-management-style

Fighting Fair to Resolve Conflict. (n.d.).  Counselling and Mental Health Centre. University of Texas at Austin. [Online] https://cmhc.utexas.edu/fightingfair.html

Goleman, D. (April 2012). Daniel Goleman Introduces Emotional Intelligence .  Big Think. [Online] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y7m9eNoB3NU

Grant, A., (February 2021). The Easiest Person to Fool .  The Hidden Brain. NPR Podcast. [Online] https://hidden-brain.simplecast.com/episodes/the-easiest-person-to-fool-f1hbMrGr

Grant, A., (April 2021). The Science of Productive Conflict . TED Podcast. [Online] https://www.ted.com/podcasts/worklife/the-science-of-productive-conflict-transcript

O’Connor, T., (October 2020). 3 Simple Conflict Analysis Tools That Anyone Can Use. [Online] https://medium.com/p/c30689757a0d

Plan Do Check Act: A Simple Problem Solving Methodology. (2021).  Educational-Business-Articles.com [Online] https://www.educational-business-articles.com/plan-do-check-act/

Segal, J., Robinson, L., and Smith, M. (2020). Conflict Resolution Skills. Helpguide.org. [Online] https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/conflict-resolution-skills.htm

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5 Strategies for Conflict Resolution in the Workplace

• 07 Sep 2023

Any scenario in which you live, work, and collaborate with others is susceptible to conflict. Because workplaces are made up of employees with different backgrounds, personalities, opinions, and daily lives, discord is bound to occur. To navigate it, it’s crucial to understand why it arises and your options for resolving it.

Common reasons for workplace conflict include:

• Misunderstandings or poor communication skills
• Differing opinions, viewpoints, or personalities
• Biases or stereotypes
• Variations in learning or processing styles
• Perceptions of unfairness

Although conflict is common, many don’t feel comfortable handling it—especially with colleagues. As a business leader, you’ll likely clash with other managers and need to help your team work through disputes.

Here’s why conflict resolution is important and five strategies for approaching it.

Access your free e-book today.

Why Is Addressing Workplace Conflict Important?

Pretending conflict doesn’t exist doesn’t make it go away. Ignoring issues can lead to missed deadlines, festering resentment, and unsuccessful initiatives.

Yet, according to coaching and training firm Bravely , 53 percent of employees handle “toxic” situations by avoiding them. Worse still, averting a difficult conversation can cost an organization $7,500 and more than seven workdays.

That adds up quickly: American businesses lose $359 billion yearly due to the impact of unresolved conflict.

As a leader, you have a responsibility to foster healthy conflict resolution and create a safe, productive work environment for employees.

“Some rights, such as the right to safe working conditions or the right against sexual harassment, are fundamental to the employment relationship,” says Harvard Business School Professor Nien-hê Hsieh in the course Leadership, Ethics, and Corporate Accountability . “These rights are things that employees should be entitled to no matter what. They’re often written into the law, but even when they aren’t, they’re central to the ethical treatment of others, which involves respecting the inherent dignity and intrinsic worth of each individual.”

Effectively resolving disputes as they arise benefits your employees’ well-being and your company’s financial health. The first step is learning about five conflict resolution strategies at your disposal.

Related: How to Navigate Difficult Conversations with Employees

While there are several approaches to conflict, some can be more effective than others. The Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Model —developed by Dr. Kenneth W. Thomas and Dr. Ralph H. Kilmann—outlines five strategies for conflict resolution:

• Accommodating
• Compromising
• Collaborating

These fall on a graph, with assertiveness on the y-axis and cooperativeness on the x-axis. In the Thomas-Kilmann model, “assertiveness” refers to the extent to which you try to reach your own goal, and “cooperativeness” is the extent to which you try to satisfy the other party’s goal.

Alternatively, you can think of these axis labels as the “importance of my goal” and the “importance of this relationship.” If your assertiveness is high, you aim to achieve your own goal. If your cooperativeness is high, you strive to help the other person reach theirs to maintain the relationship.

Here’s a breakdown of the five strategies and when to use each.

1. Avoiding

Avoiding is a strategy best suited for situations in which the relationship’s importance and goal are both low.

While you’re unlikely to encounter these scenarios at work, they may occur in daily life. For instance, imagine you’re on a public bus and the passenger next to you is loudly playing music. You’ll likely never bump into that person again, and your goal of a pleasant bus ride isn’t extremely pressing. Avoiding conflict by ignoring the music is a valid option.

In workplace conflicts—where your goals are typically important and you care about maintaining a lasting relationship with colleagues—avoidance can be detrimental.

Remember: Some situations require avoiding conflict, but you’re unlikely to encounter them in the workplace.

2. Competing

Competing is another strategy that, while not often suited for workplace conflict, can be useful in some situations.

This conflict style is for scenarios in which you place high importance on your goal and low importance on your relationships with others. It’s high in assertiveness and low in cooperation.

You may choose a competing style in a crisis. For instance, if someone is unconscious and people are arguing about what to do, asserting yourself and taking charge can help the person get medical attention quicker.

You can also use it when standing up for yourself and in instances where you feel unsafe. In those cases, asserting yourself and reaching safety is more critical than your relationships with others.

When using a competing style in situations where your relationships do matter (for instance, with a colleague), you risk impeding trust—along with collaboration, creativity, and productivity.

3. Accommodating

The third conflict resolution strategy is accommodation, in which you acquiesce to the other party’s needs. Use accommodating in instances where the relationship matters more than your goal.

For example, if you pitch an idea for a future project in a meeting, and one of your colleagues says they believe it will have a negative impact, you could resolve the conflict by rescinding your original thought.

This is useful if the other person is angry or hostile or you don’t have a strong opinion on the matter. It immediately deescalates conflict by removing your goal from the equation.

While accommodation has its place within organizational settings, question whether you use it to avoid conflict. If someone disagrees with you, simply acquiescing can snuff out opportunities for innovation and creative problem-solving .

As a leader, notice whether your employees frequently fall back on accommodation. If the setting is safe, encouraging healthy debate can lead to greater collaboration.

Related: How to Create a Culture of Ethics and Accountability in the Workplace

4. Compromising

Compromising is a conflict resolution strategy in which you and the other party willingly forfeit some of your needs to reach an agreement. It’s known as a “lose-lose” strategy, since neither of you achieve your full goal.

This strategy works well when your care for your goal and the relationship are both moderate. You value the relationship, but not so much that you abandon your goal, like in accommodation.

For example, maybe you and a peer express interest in leading an upcoming project. You could compromise by co-leading it or deciding one of you leads this one and the other the next one.

Compromising requires big-picture thinking and swallowing your pride, knowing you won’t get all your needs fulfilled. The benefits are that you and the other party value your relationship and make sacrifices to reach a mutually beneficial resolution.

5. Collaborating

Where compromise is a lose-lose strategy, collaboration is a win-win. In instances of collaboration, your goal and the relationship are equally important, motivating both you and the other party to work together to find an outcome that meets all needs.

An example of a situation where collaboration is necessary is if one of your employees isn’t performing well in their role—to the point that they’re negatively impacting the business. While maintaining a strong, positive relationship is important, so is finding a solution to their poor performance. Framing the conflict as a collaboration can open doors to help each other discover its cause and what you can do to improve performance and the business’s health.

Collaboration is ideal for most workplace conflicts. Goals are important, but so is maintaining positive relationships with co-workers. Promote collaboration whenever possible to find creative solutions to problems . If you can’t generate a win-win idea, you can always fall back on compromise.

Considering Your Responsibilities as a Leader

As a leader, not only must you address your own conflicts but help your employees work through theirs. When doing so, remember your responsibilities to your employees—whether ethical, legal, or economic.

Leadership, Ethics, and Corporate Accountability groups your ethical responsibilities to employees into five categories:

• Well-being: What’s ultimately good for the person
• Rights: Entitlement to receive certain treatment
• Duties: A moral obligation to behave in a specific way
• Best practices: Aspirational standards not required by law or cultural norms
• Fairness: Impartial and just treatment

In the course, Hsieh outlines three types of fairness you can use when helping employees solve conflicts:

• Legitimate expectations: Employees reasonably expect certain practices or behaviors to continue based on experiences with the organization and explicit promises.
• Procedural fairness: Managers must resolve issues impartially and consistently.
• Distributive fairness: Your company equitably allocates opportunities, benefits, and burdens.

Particularly with procedural fairness, ensure you don’t take sides when mediating conflict. Treat both parties equally, allowing them time to speak and share their perspectives. Guide your team toward collaboration or compromise, and work toward a solution that achieves the goal while maintaining—and even strengthening—relationships.

Are you interested in learning how to navigate difficult decisions as a leader? Explore Leadership, Ethics, and Corporate Accountability —one of our online leadership and management courses —and download our free guide to becoming a more effective leader.

About the Author

14 Conflict Resolution Strategies for the Workplace

One lesson common to humanity is how to negotiate conflict skillfully.

In a keynote speech to graduate students in conflict analysis, international mediator Kenneth Cloke (2011) made a profound statement that has stayed with me to this day: “Conflict is the arrow pointing to what we need to learn the most.”

Interpersonal skills such as conflict resolution extend beyond social circles, affecting the workplace and illuminating lessons yet to be learned.

American businesses lose $359 billion yearly due to unresolved conflict and low productivity (Kauth, 2020). The physical, emotional, psychological, and interpersonal tolls are incalculable.

Can we seek a better understanding of conflict and transform its devastating effects?

Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our three Work & Career Coaching Exercises for free . These detailed, science-based exercises will help you or your clients identify opportunities for professional growth and create a more meaningful career.

This Article Contains:

What is conflict resolution & why is it important, 5 psychological benefits of conflict resolution, 7 examples of conflict resolution skills, how to do conflict resolution: 2 approaches, 6 methods and approaches to apply in the office, 6 strategies and techniques for the workplace, best activities, games, workbooks, and online tools, helpful books for managers and organizations, resources from positivepsychology.com, a take-home message.

Pruitt and Kim (2004, pp. 7–8) describe conflict as “perceived divergence of interest, a belief that the parties’ current aspirations are incompatible.”

Conflict resolution is an agreement reached when all or most of the issues of contention are cleared up (Pruitt & Kim, 2004).

Further, conflict management is a product of successful problem-solving in which the parties have worked out ways to de-escalate conflict and avoid future escalations.

Conflict can be disruptive and, at worst, destructive. Once it erupts, it’s hard to control (Bolton, 1986). Emotions run high during conflict, blocking the path to rational solutions.

Conflict resolution is important because “when people experience conflicts, much of their energy goes into emotions related to those conflicts” (Wilmot & Hocker, 2011, p. 2).

Some emotions commonly associated with conflict include fear, anger, distrust, rejection, defensiveness, hopelessness, resentment, and stress (Wilmot & Hocker, 2011; Bolton, 1986).

Another reason conflict resolution is important is because people involved in heavily contentious conflict are likely to experience “a wide range of psychological and physical health problems including weakened immune system, depression, alcoholism, and eating disorders” (Pruitt & Kim, 2004, pp. 11–12).

Clearly, languishing in this state of emotional upheaval and chaos is harmful emotionally, physically, and psychologically.

Conflict resolution: A theoretical framework

Realistic conflict theory assumes “conflict can always be explained by some tangible (like territory, money, prizes) or intangible (like power, prestige, honor) resource that is desired by both groups and is in short supply” (Pruitt & Kim, 2004, pp. 28–29).

This theory attempts to explain why conflict occurs as humans perpetually strive to acquire perceived needs.

Cortisol released because of ongoing stress soaks the brain’s nerve cells, causing memories to shrink (Leaf, 2008).

This affects the ability to think creatively, a helpful component for resolution.

In addition, the stress response increases blood sugar levels, speeding up our heart rate to pump blood to our arms, legs, and brain in preparation to escape (Leaf, 2008). This physiological fight-or-flight reaction  saps precious energy.

Dealing with emotions first will help reduce emotional arousal and stress. Once the body returns to normal, rational problem-solving skills can resume. Typically, people get into trouble when they address conflict at the peak of emotional arousal.

For this reason, acknowledge that the issue needs to be addressed but wait until emotions subside before engaging in a discussion. This ensures the issue is not ignored. In other words, conflict can be scheduled .

Some psychological benefits of conflict resolution include (Arslan, Hamarta, & Usla, 2010; Sexton & Orchard, 2016; Bolton, 1986):

• Stress reduction
• Improved self-esteem

Improved self-efficacy

• Better relationships

Increased energy

Let’s take a quick look at two of the most common benefits.

Self-efficacy is a person’s belief in their capability to complete a specific task successfully (Lunenburg, 2011). Learning and practicing skills such as effective communication and conflict resolution are essential building blocks for self-efficacy. Successful conflict resolution skills in the workplace increase confidence, promoting the likelihood of future successes (Lunenburg, 2011).

Increased self-efficacy “influences the tasks employees choose to learn and the goals they set for themselves” (Lunenburg, 2011, p. 1). It also influences employees’ efforts and perseverance when taking on and learning new tasks (Lunenburg, 2011).

Sometimes you have to expend energy to gain energy. Conflict robs individuals and organizations of precious energy. Mastering conflict resolution skills takes energy initially but can save energy in the long run through reduced stress and improved relationships and productivity.

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To reap the benefits of resolving conflict, certain helpful skills must be applied, and there are many conflict resolution skills that are effective for the workplace.

Below are skills believed to be crucial for resolving conflict.

1. Self-awareness

Self-awareness is described by Goleman (1995, p. 43) as “recognizing a feeling as it happens.” Goleman states that people with high self-awareness have moment-to-moment awareness and navigate life adeptly.

2. Self-control

Self-control is the ability to manage unruly impulses and emotions effectively. Because emotions play a central role in conflict, the ability to stay composed despite heightened emotions is essential to constructive resolution.

3. Assertive communication

Bolton (1986) describes assertive communication as a dynamic communication style in which the speaker maintains self-respect, expresses personal needs, and defends their own rights without abusing or dominating others.

While an aggressive communication style may shut down a conversation, assertiveness encourages dialogue. This skill takes practice and courage. Bolton (1986) asserts that less than 5% of the population communicates assertively.

4. Collaboration

According to Folger, Poole, and Stutman (2009), the goal of collaboration is to consider all the important needs of the primary parties and develop a solution that meets these needs.

5. Problem-solving

Problem-solving in relation to conflict resolution is a strategy that pursues alternative solutions that satisfy the needs and goals of the parties involved (Pruitt & Kim, 2004).

According to Sorensen (2017), empathy is the ability to share and understand the emotions and feelings of others. Our understanding of another person’s perspective can increase the likelihood of emotional connection and collaboration.

7. Listening

Active listening is one of the most underrated and underutilized conflict resolution skills. Listening during conflict achieves key goals, primarily putting an end to cyclical arguing and opening the door to empathy and understanding.

The conflict resolution method

This simple, three-step formula for conflict resolution works well for conflicts involving values and intense emotions.

Step 1: Engage with the other respectfully

Respect is an attitude shown through specific behaviors, such as how you look at the other person, how you listen, your tone of voice, and word choices.

Step 2: Listen fully until you experience their side

The goal of listening in this manner is to understand the content of the other person’s ideas or contributions, what it means for them, and their feelings about it.

Step 3: Verbalize your feelings, views, and needs

Assertive communication works well in this stage. Some caveats accompany this stage of conflict resolution:

• This step is not always necessary.
• Make your statement brief.
• Avoid loaded words.
• Be truthful and concise.
• Disclose your feelings.

Collaborative problem-solving

Bolton (1986) provides a six-step outline for collaboration when the issue is more about needs than emotions.

• Define the primary needs surrounding the conflict.
• Brainstorm possible solutions.
• Choose solutions that meet the needs of both parties.
• Create an agenda delineating who will assume each task.
• Implement the plan.
• Evaluate the solutions and reevaluate if needed.

The conflict resolution method and collaborative problem-solving are generalized approaches to conflict resolution when two or more parties are willing to work together on an issue.

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Lipsky, Seeber, and Fincher (2003) provide approaches to work through issues that erupt in work settings.

1. The open door policy

This generalized philosophy is intended to show that management supports open dialogue and encourages staff to discuss differences that arise in the workplace. It is considered an initial step toward conflict resolution.

2. Ombudspersons

These are neutral or impartial managers who provide informal and confidential assistance to staff and management in order to resolve work-related disputes. Ombudspersons may wear a variety of hats, including mediator, fact-finder, consultant, and change agent.

3. Internal peer mediation

Some organizations call on designated employees as mediators to help resolve conflict. This method often addresses issues of a non-statutory nature, such as unfairness.

The success of this method rests on the careful selection of peer mediators based on their exemplary communication skills and abilities.

4. Professional mediators

Professional mediators are not connected with the organization in any way and function as independent, impartial, third parties who assist the primary parties through a formal mediation process.

Mediation is a viable option for creating structure to conflict resolution in an unbiased manner.

5. Peer review and employee appeals

This process is sometimes used by manufacturing organizations in an effort to avoid a union process. The underlying belief is that if at all possible, employee disputes should be resolved internally.

6. Executive panels

This method provides an opportunity for employees to present their claims to a panel of the organization’s senior executives, assuming they will be objective and sympathetic.

Using tools such as questionnaires, activities, and assessments can help employees work through conflict by adding insight and skills to the equation. Let’s look at some such tools.

2 Tools for groups

Often, people haven’t been taught the skills to discuss issues calmly and productively. The following worksheets can be used to provide structure to conflict.

Reviewing these worksheets before conflict erupts is a great opportunity to open a conversation and agree upon a conflict resolution process before matters spiral out of control.

The Remaining Calm During Conflict – I worksheet helps clients walk through conflict, providing tips on how to perceive conflict and deal with emotional reactions.

The Remaining Calm During Conflict – II worksheet encourages clients to journal about times when they did and did not remain calm during a workplace conflict.

2 Effective questionnaires

This self-assessment provided by CINERGY™ can be used to broaden the scope of awareness of ourselves and others, particularly during conflict. The assessment measures an individual’s current level of conflict intelligence.

This Conflict Management Styles Assessment , made available by the Blake Group, allows clients to uncover their primary conflict style and includes a description of the five conflict management styles.

A look at meditation for conflict resolution

This video provides an insightful awareness of our own habitual patterns and how these manifest in us and others during conflict.

Here is another recommended video that helps visualize how to prepare for conflict and build boundaries with others in a calm manner.

The Two Dollar Game

The Two Dollar Game was developed to help employees learn basic conflict styles and the art of negotiation in a fun, thoughtful way.

Conflict Description Template

This conflict management template created by the University of Iowa is intended to deal with conflict in a university setting but can easily apply to other teams or departments and used as an intuitive conflict mapping guide.

Coping With Stress in the Workplace Workbook by Ester Leutenberg and John Liptak

This workbook by Leutenberg and Liptak contains activities, assessments, journaling prompts, and educational handouts that can be photocopied and used to address conflict in the workplace.

Chapters contain resources about how to deal with workplace stress , different personalities, work habits, and relationships.

Online tools and resources for conflict resolution

The website Online Master of Legal Studies includes a wealth of Free Tools and Resources for Conflict Resolution . Some resources have been incorporated into this blog.

The wide variety of resources include a Cost of Conflict Calculator and tools to enhance cross-cultural communication.

Role-play activity

In this Assertive Message Role-Play , participants are presented with various workplace scenarios and encouraged to formulate assertive messages to initiate a discussion about the problem at hand.

1. People Skills: How to Assert Yourself, Listen to Others, and Resolve Conflicts – Robert Bolton

Some books are classics.

This one has been used for years to help guide individuals through the communication and conflict resolution process.

It’s a great resource for anyone interested in building robust interpersonal skills.

Find the book on Amazon .

2. The Big Book of Conflict Resolution Games: Quick, Effective Activities to Improve Communication, Trust and Collaboration – Mary Scannell

This is a useful resource for incorporating activities and games to help employees listen to each other, engage productively, and create a culture of respect.

Topics include conflict, communication, diversity, trust, perspectives, emotional intelligence, and collaboration.

3. Emerging Systems for Managing Workplace Conflict – David Lipsky, Ronald Seeber, and Richard Fincher

The authors walk readers through the emergence of conflict in the workplace by creating dispute resolution systems for integration in a corporate setting.

This is a helpful resource for managers and corporate leaders interested in reducing the corporate costs of conflict.

4. Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High – Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan, and Al Switzler

Crucial Conversations is a New York Times bestseller that provides tools to traverse difficult and important conversations.

Ideas discussed in this book can help transform your career, organization, and community.

Readers learn how to listen and speak in ways that create safety and inclusion.

• Assertive Communication This worksheet helps clients learn the difference between passive, aggressive, and assertive communication. Assertive communication is essential for expressing our needs and opinions, and defending our rights in a direct and respectful manner.
• Active Listening Reflection Worksheet Use this worksheet to help clients sharpen listening skills essential for conflict resolution.

The worksheet reviews eight essential skills for active listening and includes a reflection exercise to evaluate which skills we use effectively and which can be strengthened.

• Blindfold Guiding Exercise This exercise can be used as an icebreaker or as part of a  team-building exercise when members are struggling with trust issues.

Trust is a crucial element of team stability and is essential when conflict erupts. In this exercise, one person leads a blindfolded partner using simple statements. As trust builds, the duo can be instructed to speed up, slow down, or attempt to lead with silence.

• Generating Alternative Solutions and Better Decision-Making This worksheet provides a map to work through problem-solving by considering three solutions to a specific issue accompanied by a discussion on the efficacy, do-ability, and effectiveness of the identified solution.
• 17 Positive Communication Exercises If you’re looking for more science-based ways to help others communicate better, check out this collection of 17 validated positive communication tools for practitioners . Use them to help others improve their communication skills and form deeper and more positive relationships.

Conflict divides. The effects of poorly handled conflict range from disruptive to destructive. It robs individuals and organizations of precious resources, such as energy, productivity, peace, and harmony.

Regardless of our station in life, we all still have lessons to learn.

Will we ever be free of conflict? Perhaps we can look at it another way. As we gain skills and experience successes resolving conflict, we can anticipate the next conflict and the next lesson, mindful of the potential wisdom and strengths we’ll gain in the process.

Are you facing an unresolved conflict at work or in your personal life? Try not to be discouraged; instead, think of it as your next life lesson waiting to be discovered.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Work & Career Coaching Exercises for free .

• Arslan, C., Hamarta, E., & Usla, M. (2010). The relationship between conflict communication, self-esteem and life satisfaction in university students.  Educational Research and Reviews ,  5 (1), 31–34.
• Bolton, R. (1986). People skills: How to assert yourself, listen to others, and resolve conflict . Touchstone. https://www.amazon.com/dp/067162248X/
• Cloke, K. (2011). Untitled [Keynote Speaker]. In 24th Residential Institute – Winter 2011 . Nova Southeastern University.
• Folger, J. P., Poole, M. S., & Stutman, R. K. (2009). Working through conflict: Strategies for relationships, groups, and organizations . Pearson Education. https://www.amazon.com/dp/0367461471/
• Goleman, D. (1995). Emotional intelligence: Why it can matter more than IQ . Bantam Books. https://www.amazon.com/dp/055338371X/
• Kauth, K. (2020, January). Cost of workplace conflict . Mediate.com. Retrieved November 27, 2021, from https://www.mediate.com/articles/kauth-cost-workplace.cfm
• Leaf, C. (2008). Who switched off my brain? Controlling toxic thoughts and emotions . Thomas Nelson. https://www.amazon.com/dp/0620384247/
• Leutenberg, E. R. A., & Liptak, J. J. (2014).  Coping with stress in the workplace workbook.  Whole Person Associates. https://www.amazon.com/dp/1570253153/
• Lipsky, D. B., Seeber, R. L., & Fincher, R. D. (2003). Emerging systems for managing workplace conflict . Jossey-Bass. https://www.amazon.com/dp/0787964344/
• Lunenburg, F. C. (2011). Self-efficacy in the workplace: Implications for motivation and performance. International Journal of Management, Business, and Administration , 14 (1), 1–6.
• Patterson, K., Grenny, J., McMillan, R., & Switzler, A. (2011).  Crucial conversations: Tools for talking when stakes are high  (2nd ed.). McGraw Hill. https://www.amazon.com/dp/0071771328/
• Pruitt, D. G., & Kim, S. H. (2004). Social conflict: Escalation, stalemate, and settlement (3rd ed.). McGraw Hill. https://www.amazon.com/dp/0072855355/
• Scannell, M. (2010).  The big book of conflict resolution games: Quick, effective activities to improve communication, trust and collaboration.  McGraw Hill. https://www.amazon.com/dp/0071742247/
• Sexton, M., & Orchard, C. (2016). Understanding healthcare professionals’ self-efficacy to resolve interprofessional conflict. Journal of Interprofessional Care , 30 (3), 316–323. https://doi.org/10.3109/13561820.2016.1147021
• Sorensen, M. S. (2017). I hear you: The surprisingly simple skill behind extraordinary relationships . Autumn Creek Press. https://www.amazon.com/dp/0999104004/
• Wilmot, W., & Hocker, J. (2011). Interpersonal conflict (8th ed.). McGraw Hill. https://www.amazon.com/dp/0073523941/

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its a good article, however, it lacks some important theories, concepts and skills required to handle workplace conflict effectively. Most of the material presented is left to the reader’s discretion in the form of links, whereas, I was hoping to read a detailed feature.

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This is probably the most complete, and beneficial articles I have read about conflict resolution in a long while. Dr. Wilson has seamlessly woven all the important pieces of information, tools, and further readings for us. What a joy to read!

The post is helpful for many working people as scaling down such nasty situations is the best course of action. There are many interesting aspects about human coalitional psychology in Albuquerque, NM, that many are unaware of and are something you need to know.

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7 Effective Conflict Resolution Techniques In The Workplace

Estimated reading time: 9 minutes

The Three C’s Of Conflict Resolution

1. open communication, 2. active listening, 3. emotional intelligence, 4. impartiality, 5. patience, 1. investigate the situation, 2. find common ground, 3. brainstorm potential solutions, 4. agree on a solution, 5. establish responsibilities, 6. document the incident, 7. follow up.

In the bustling hive of a modern workplace, clashing opinions, priorities, and aspirations are almost inevitable.

🖼️ Picture this: Two dedicated team members find themselves at odds over a critical project timeline. As deadlines loom and tensions rise, the once-cohesive partnership begins to crack under the weight of differing viewpoints. Amidst this turmoil, complaints to colleagues escalate the situation, underscoring the urgency of effective conflict resolution.

This scenario, while fictional, is all too familiar to anyone who has experienced the challenges of workplace dynamics. However, conflicts don’t necessarily indicate the downfall of collaboration. They can serve as catalysts for growth, understanding, and improved teamwork.

This article covers the “Three C’s” of conflict resolution, essential skills to navigate tense conversations, and a seven-step process to effectively manage conflicts in the workplace.

What Is Conflict Resolution?

Conflict resolution is the process of addressing and resolving disagreements, disputes, or conflicts between individuals or groups fairly and constructively.

1. Communication: Effective communication involves actively listening to all parties involved, expressing oneself clearly and respectfully, and facilitating open and honest dialogue to understand and address underlying issues.

2. Collaboration: Collaboration involves working together to find mutually acceptable solutions. This includes brainstorming ideas, sharing perspectives, and seeking common ground to reach resolutions that consider the interests of all parties.

3. Compromise: Compromise involves finding a middle ground and making concessions to meet the needs of both sides. It requires a willingness to give and take, ensuring that no single party’s desires dominate the outcome.

These principles form a foundation for productively navigating conflict.

5 Conflict Resolution Skills

Effective workplace conflict resolution often relies on several universal skills, including:

Transparent dialogue creates a work environment where individuals feel safe, heard, and valued. To catch conflict early, managers should consider implementing an open-door policy. This encourages employees to reach out to management for conflicts of importance without fear of repercussion.

Active listening is a cornerstone skill in effective conflict resolution. It involves giving undivided attention to the speaker, understanding their perspective, and acknowledging their emotions. Practicing active listening may include:

• Using open body language, such as facing the speaker and keeping arms uncrossed
• Maintaining eye contact
• Paraphrasing or summarizing the speaker’s points
• Avoiding interrupting

This not only ensures accurate comprehension but also fosters a sense of validation and respect for the other person’s viewpoint. With open minds and open ears, conflicts can be de-escalated and pave the way for collaborative problem-solving.

Emotional intelligence involves recognizing and regulating one’s emotions while empathetically perceiving and addressing the emotions of others. By staying attuned to emotional cues and nonverbal signals, individuals can navigate tense situations with sensitivity and tact.

Emotional intelligence allows conflict resolvers to guide discussions in a manner that considers the underlying feelings and concerns of all parties involved. This fosters a more conducive environment for finding common ground and reaching mutually beneficial resolutions.

Resolving conflict becomes increasingly difficult when individuals stray away from the problem at hand. When navigating conflict, avoid these pitfalls:

• Bringing up unrelated previous conflicts
• Attacking character or personal traits
• Making assumptions based on personal biases

Impartiality allows parties to fairly assess the situation, consider diverse viewpoints, and make well-informed decisions that prioritize the best interests of the organization and its employees. This skill fosters trust and confidence, resulting in balanced and equitable outcomes that contribute to a harmonious workplace.

The nature of workplace conflicts often demands time for issues to unravel, emotions to settle, and perspectives to clarify. Practicing patience means refraining from rushing to conclusions or decisions prematurely.

Even if there appears to be an obvious solution, it’s important to allow ample time for all parties to feel involved in the decision-making process. Give individuals the space and time they need to fully express themselves and ensure that all relevant information is brought to the table.

7 Proven Steps To Resolve A Conflict In The Workplace

The following framework can be employed to effectively manage conflicts in the workplace, integrating the essential skills mentioned above.

When conflict arises in the workplace, the first step is to conduct a thorough investigation into the matter. This includes:

• Speaking with involved parties to understand what needs are not being met
• Asking questions about what outcomes each party would like to achieve
• Determining if employees can work out the issue on their own or if a third party is needed (i.e., HR, management, etc.)

Thoroughly understanding both sides of the dispute ensures an accurate representation of the situation and allows the root causes to be determined before proceeding.

Finding common ground in workplace conflict resolution entails pinpointing shared goals, values, or interests that can serve as a foundation for constructive dialogue. Oftentimes, both parties are working towards the same goal but have differing viewpoints on how to achieve it.

Recognizing commonalities helps create a sense of unity and opens the door for more productive discussions, as individuals can begin to see beyond their differences and work toward a mutually beneficial resolution.

With common ground established, the next step is to facilitate a brainstorming session to generate potential solutions. Those who are managing workplace conflict resolution can encourage the parties to contribute ideas without judgment, discussing the pros and cons of each solution in a collaborative way.

Next step is to negotiate and agree upon the most suitable resolution. This may involve compromise and open dialogue, where each party has the opportunity to voice their preferences and concerns. Both parties should strive for a solution that is fair, realistic, and aligns with the common ground identified earlier. Achieving consensus ensures that all parties have a vested interest in the resolution’s success.

By clearly defining the roles and responsibilities of those involved, everyone will be aware of their contributions toward the resolution process. By delineating responsibilities, the focus shifts from finger-pointing to collaborative problem-solving, creating a sense of ownership and accountability. This clears the path for a more streamlined and efficient conflict resolution process, where all individuals work together to achieve a mutually satisfactory outcome.

A document of the incident serves as an official record that can be referred to in the future if needed. The following details could be included:

• The parties involved
• The nature of the conflict
• The chosen resolution
• Actions or commitments made

This provides clarity and accountability, reducing the likelihood of misunderstandings down the line. It also helps employers monitor common causes of problems within the workplace and identify employees who may be toxic to the environment.

Once a conflict is resolved, relationships don’t always return to normal. Maintaining open lines of communication after reaching a solution prevents regression in progress and the emergence of new issues. This includes checking in with the individuals involved and ensuring both sides of the agreement are upheld. Ongoing communication demonstrates an organization’s commitment to the welfare of employees and dedication to maintaining a healthy work environment.

Effective workplace conflict resolution transcends mere agreement. It creates an environment where diverse viewpoints come together, solutions arise from unique angles, and unity prevails amidst differences. Both employers and individuals can adopt conflict resolution strategies to turn challenges into prospects. This nurtures a workplace where conflicts, handled with empathy and expertise, lead to a future characterized by collaboration, collective well-being, and shared achievements.

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What Is Conflict Resolution?

Why are conflict resolution skills important, conflict resolution skills examples, conflict resolution skills at work: case studies, how to build conflict resolution skills, conflict resolution skills: the bottom line, how to build conflict resolution skills: case studies and examples.

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Table of Contents

No one likes conflict. When you disagree with a coworker, it can be awkward at best and lead to job dissatisfaction and even a threat to your position at worst. Conflict resolution skills are crucial to positive work relationships, success, and growth at work. 

But what exactly are conflict resolution skills? How can you cultivate them, even without work experience? We’ll discuss everything you need to know about conflict resolution, why it’s essential, and how to build these critical soft skills — without stepping foot into an office.

Conflict resolution is the ability to end a dispute respectfully in a way that benefits all parties. More simply, it’s the ability to end a disagreement, argument, or even a fight politely and successfully.

In our everyday lives, this can range from something as simple as disagreeing with your friend on what to cook for dinner to something larger like addressing your friend’s feelings when they’re feeling left out of your friend group. In the workplace, conflict ranges from small to big, too; you might disagree with a coworker about how to phrase an email your company is sending, or you might have a more significant conflict about how they acted while working with you on a project. 

Regardless of the situation, conflict resolution skills can help you work through challenges with others to get your work done more efficiently and stress-free. Conflict resolution skills can lead to: 

• Better working relationships: Working with someone you find difficult is no fun. Conflict resolution skills can help you iron out issues so you can work together harmoniously.
• Getting work done more efficiently: When you can resolve conflict with others, work, especially collaborative projects, becomes much more manageable. You don’t need a coworker to be yet another blocker to hitting your team’s goals; instead, work becomes easier when you can collaborate and work together, not against each other.
• Happier work environment: It’s unpleasant to show up to work (in-person or virtually) when you have a conflict with someone. Addressing issues head-on can clear the air and make your work experience more enjoyable.
• Career growth: Conflict resolution skills are valuable soft skills. Being an effective mediator can help you become a more successful and personable employee, someone everyone wants to work with and have on their team.

Client Service

Practice de-escalating conflict as a customer service specialist. Record a call between you and your client and suggest a suitable path forward.

Avg. Time: 3-4 hours

Skills you’ll build: Triage, problem-solving, de-escalation, customer retention, composure

Conflict resolution requires various skills to effectively listen to others, empathize with them, and work together toward a solution. 

Active Listening

Active listening is when you’re not only listening to someone but actively engaging with and processing what they’re saying. It might look like engaged body language (like nodding and eye contact) or asking follow-up questions to clarify or further explore what the other person was saying.

Active listening is vital to conflict resolution. It allows you to truly understand and process what the other person in the conflict is going through. Listening to their perspective and taking it seriously can help you know where they’re coming from and find a solution that considers their feelings, perspectives, and goals. 

Negotiation

Resolving a conflict often means you’ll need to use negotiation skills to get the outcome you’re looking for. The goal is to find a solution that works for both or all parties, which means asking for what you want while trying to find a middle ground. 

Many of us may shy away from conflict because it requires asserting ourselves in sometimes awkward or difficult situations. This is where leadership skills come in. The decision to resolve a conflict requires one person to step up to address the problem — taking ownership, considering multiple perspectives, and developing an action plan. 

Decision-Making

Conflict resolution ends with a decision that benefits all parties. Good decision-making skills can help you assess the facts of the situation and come to a rational conclusion. These skills also come in handy when a conflict seems to drag on forever; people who are good decision-makers are biased toward action and focus on finding a solution rather than continuing to fight.

Communication

Unfortunately, even if you’re in a dispute with a person you really can’t stand, you’ll need to communicate with them to resolve a conflict. Using communication skills to speak or write confidently, clearly, and with empathy can help you find an agreeable solution more efficiently. 

>>MORE: What Are Verbal Communication Skills?

Collaboration

When you’re in a conflict, it can feel like you’re going head-to-head with someone else; however, you must work together to resolve that conflict. Collaboration skills ensure you consider the other person’s perspective, communicate the right information, and work together to determine the best solution.

Now you know what conflict resolution skills are, but how are they actually applied at work?

Connecting on the Outcome

Peter Premenko, founder and president of Phronesis Group, a boutique consultancy focusing on leadership, management, and team culture development, shared a time he wanted to change a company process—but not everyone was on board.

“My team needed to change the way we executed new employee onboarding,” Premenko says. “Our director of recruiting was dead set against the change because our existing program was world-class, and his team relied on it as part of the pitch to come work for our company. My approach with him was to take things up a level to something we did agree on: having the best people doing their best work for our company. This way we were solving a problem we both cared about together, instead of trying to defend my priority and defeat his. It took a little longer than I might have liked, but he eventually saw why the change I wanted to make was important and agreed to it.”

Connecting on why Premenko wanted to make the change allowed the director of recruiting to understand his motivation and realize they shared the same goal. 

Leading With Kindness

Stefan Chekanov, co-founder and CEO of Brosix, a secure instant messenger, shared a stressful moment when his team had been working hard to release new software features, include an AI integration, and redesign the company website. 

“This churn caused a bit of extra tension to start brewing internally, and unproductive, heated discussions rarely lead to anything more than mutual frustration,” Chekanov says.

To resolve the conflict, Chekanov decided to lead with kindness. 

“Whenever I noticed a team member (including myself) becoming increasingly agitated, I set up a private meeting for a genuine heart-to-heart,” he said. “At the end of the day, leading with empathy is how I gently nudge communication in a more constructive, positive direction. You don’t need work experience to be a decent human being, to put it simply.”

Providing Context

I had a conflict with a manager about an article I was working on about the “girlboss.” The main point of my article was that “girlboss” isn’t something to strive to be, but my manager disagreed and asked me to rewrite the piece. She took offense, thinking I wasn’t advocating for women’s advancement in the workplace; I took offense because she thought those were my views!

To resolve the conflict, I realized a vital piece of context was missing. As a Gen Zer, “girlboss” is a term my friends and I use sarcastically and jokingly; however, when the term first came into the cultural context, it was considered empowering. 

>>MORE: Bye-Bye, ‘Bandwidth’ — 50 Examples of Gen Z Jargon at Work

I did more research to show my manager how the conversation around the term had changed and brought concrete examples of how people were using the term now. After providing that context, we were able to edit the piece to add that research and nuance. It led to one of my favorite pieces I’ve ever written — one that was much better than the first draft I’d handed in.

Listening to Everyone’s Ideas

Kimberly Best’s work directly involves conflict resolution; she’s a civil mediator, trained family mediator, certified arbitrator, and owner of Best Conflict Solutions. She worked closely with a health care system with 17 medical offices struggling with employees leaving — the system had an attrition rate of 33%.

With such a company-wide issue, Best sought to understand what leaders and employees had to say. 

“First, I spoke with managers to hear what they experienced and what they proposed as resolutions,” she said. “I then formulated a statistically valid and reliable survey. I included a Likert scale and open-ended questions to get a full picture of management and team experience. Then I met with individuals and heard their stories and ideas. I asked teams to propose their needs and provide solutions.”

After listening to various people, Best used the data to meet with management and brainstorm what they could do differently. 

“Ironically, one primary need was for conflict management training and an effective conflict management system,” she said. “I provided conflict management training to teams and managers.”

After Best both provided training and helped create a system for conflict management processes, attrition at the health care system was 18% the following year.

Soft skills can feel more challenging to build because they’re less tangible than hard skills . For example, it may seem easier to approach learning programming skills , where you can take a coding bootcamp , than to learn how to collaborate better. But that doesn’t mean you can’t learn soft skills — or that you need to be in the workplace to learn them! Here’s what conflict resolution experts recommend if you’re looking to build these soft skills before landing your first role.

Role-Playing

“Participate in role-playing exercises or simulations that mimic workplace conflicts,” says Beth Fries, an organizational leadership professional and doctoral candidate researching readiness skills in diverse corporate sectors. “This can be done in a classroom setting, with friends or mentors, or through online platforms.”

Forage job simulations can help you practice conflict resolution skills without needing a friend or even leaving your home. 

Getting Ready to Join the Workforce

Practice using mediation skills to resolve an internal conflict on your team.

Avg. Time: 4-5 hours

Skills you’ll build: Emotional intelligence, prioritization, time management, self-reflection

Get Feedback

Fortunately (and unfortunately), conflict is often a part of our everyday lives, even if we might not realize it. The next time you argue with a friend or disagree with a family member, take a step back and reflect on how you approached the situation.

“Ask friends, family, or mentors for feedback on handling conflicts in everyday situations,” Fries says. “Use their input to improve your approach.”

Practice the Process

Kristyn Carmichael, professional mediator, family attorney, and certified divorce financial analyst, shares a three-step process for resolving conflict: listen, respond, resolve.

First, use active listening skills as the other person shares their perspective. Carmichael notes it’s essential to identify the “underlying issues rather than positions.”

A position is someone’s feelings about a situation, like “I don’t like working in a group with you.” 

“An interest is the underlying why: the person fears you will overshadow their work or get credit; they’re nervous you won’t put in work due to past experience; they don’t like you because you stole their lunch once (even on accident),” Carmichael says. “We all have underlying interests for what we want. It is important to be an active listener and ask questions, not become defensive or shut the other person down by shifting the conversation to yourself.”

Next, it’s time to respond by addressing the issues the person raised and acknowledging their feelings, even if you disagree with them. 

Using the same scenario of someone not wanting to work in a group with you, Carmichael offers an example response:

“Thank you for sharing with me that you don’t want to be on this project with me because you have heard negative things about my work ethic from others who have worked with me and you don’t think we will get along. I appreciate you sharing your thoughts and understand why you may be nervous to work with me.” 

Ultimately, your goal is to find a resolution that benefits everyone. Carmichael recommends brainstorming solutions that work for both parties. Once you’ve decided on one, ensure you have a plan to implement and follow through on the resolution.

Conflict can be scary, and you might try to avoid it. Yet good conflict resolution skills can not only improve your working relationships, but can also lead to career growth and a happier work environment.

“Conflict is not bad; it’s a sign of a problem to solve,” Best says. “The most important thing in conflict resolution is building trust. This is done by listening well, empathy through genuine caring, and providing an environment that is safe to be honest. Safety is achieved through the above and through confidentiality and an environment without blame or judgment. When people feel heard, understood, and validated — the world makes sense through their eyes, and you demonstrate that you can see that — then creativity and problem-solving begin.”

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How to Resolve Most Any Conflict: The Solution

Mastering the five essential steps for conflict resolution..

Posted November 27, 2023 | Reviewed by Michelle Quirk

• What Is Stress?
• Take our Burnout Test
• Find a therapist to overcome stress
• Miscommunication is inevitable in human relationships and often leads to conflict.
• When fight-or-flight takes hold, conflicts quickly escalate and become more difficult to work through.
• There are five steps that can be learned and applied to reliably resolve most conflicts.

This post is part 2 of a series.

Miscommunication is inevitable in human interactions. Biases, filters, assumptions, expectations, and nonverbal information cause distortions in interpersonal communications, altering them to fit our own point of view. As noted in part 1 , up to 75 percent of all spoken communication is misunderstood, ignored, or forgotten (Guffey & Loewy, 2016; Tankovic, Kapeš & Benazić, 2023).

Miscommunications often lead to conflict. When communicated information is perceived as a threat, our fight-or-flight response is activated. Fight-or-flight shuts down both higher-order thinking and efficient information processing, increasing the possibility of further miscommunication. Once the brain is hijacked by fight-or-flight, conflicts quickly escalate. Learning how to manage communications capable of reducing threat and promoting problem-solving requires attention to several key points.

Managing Communications

To begin with, the earlier you take notice that a conflict exists, the easier it will be to manage it. You don’t need to fully understand what is transpiring to step back. By mutually acknowledging that there seems to be a problem, rather than pushing ahead with a discussion that is becoming heated, everyone becomes empowered, and you are able to start from a place of agreement.

The next goal, before addressing the conflict itself, is to diffuse negative emotions so a conflict does not continue to escalate, induce more fear and anger , or heighten the flight-or-flight response. Creating a sense of safety allows for the diffusion of negative emotions. Some ways this might be accomplished include (but are not limited to) taking a 15-minute break to calm and center, signaling to one another a desire to work together positively, giving voice to how fight-or-flight may have taken hold, and reassuring one another that you both want to resolve the problem positively.

When we do not acknowledge that a stress response has taken hold, the situation can feel dangerous and out of control. Taking a step back allows the stress response to calm so that the focus can shift to a more rational discussion of the conflict itself. Establishing common ground, before attempting to resolve a conflict, also demonstrates respect and compassion, which facilitates trust in the relationship and efficacy in your mutual abilities to resolve the conflict. Check in with one another before you move on to the next step, providing additional time or assurances as needed to build a sense of safety.

Active Listening

Once a conducive atmosphere has been established, the goal shifts to understanding each other’s point of view. It is not yet time to begin trying to solve the problem. Understanding the other’s perspective is a critical step, only possible with active listening . Active listening differs from passive listening, where information is absorbed and processed unilaterally with no opportunity for questions, clarification, or feedback. We are not able to fully comprehend what is being communicated with passive listening. Miscommunication happens when you interpret, without seeking clarification, and listen passively, simply awaiting your turn to speak. Active listening is when you pay full attention to another’s point of view, without judgment, and, when they finish speaking, clarifying to make sure you understand their perspective before switching to stating your point of view.

There are numerous forms of active listening including restating, paraphrasing, asking open-ended questions, and using "I" statements. Further, use your body language and gestures to show you’re engaged. You can do this by angling your body toward the other(s), sustaining eye contact, and nodding. Simply saying “I understand” and moving on to stating your point of view will not do the trick. This is still passive as it does not allow the other person insight into what you have heard, nor offer opportunities for clarification. Often, one person believes there is a significant relational conflict and the other may not even recognize that a misunderstanding has occurred or may judge it as slight and inconsequential. Active listening requires that you restate what you believe you have heard and then ask if you are correct, providing the time and opportunity for clarification and correction. Active listening allows all voices to be heard and truly understood. The goal of this step is for each person to prove that they understand the viewpoint of the other. Do not move on to the next step until all parties agree that what is being restated is, in fact, the intention of the communication.

Once the conflict has been clearly defined, from all perspectives, it is time to move on to the next step. The goal here is to list all the conditions that must be met for a solution to be acceptable to everyone involved, even if the conditions appear to be contradictory. There is no limit to how many pre-conditions are set, only that they be specific and realistic. When all of the pre-conditions are listed, you are assured of understanding the problem as well as is required for a true solution to be generated. This step is frequently skipped. However, listing the essential preconditions, before searching for possible solutions, allows you to move ahead together, with shared goals . It increases the precision of the solution and decreases the probability of crystalizing a desired outcome early on, before the situation is entirely understood. Reducing investment in particular solutions opens everyone up to alternatives and increases the likelihood of a win-win scenario (Likert & Likert, 1978). It is noteworthy that many conflicts can be resolved with these four steps alone. Once all perspectives are clarified and preconditions are stated, a solution often naturally evolves. So, it really pays to put in a considerable and conscious effort in establishing common ground at the outset of communications.

Generating Possible Solutions

Only now it is time to generate possible solutions. Consider the advantages and disadvantages of each possible solution and be open to compromise. By working together to creatively brainstorm potential solutions, all parties will feel respected. Once you choose a solution, clearly define all the terms and conditions for implementation and make sure everyone understands their responsibilities. Set times to check in with one another to make sure the solution remains sound and is accomplishing what you had hoped for.

Of course, some conflicts do not resolve with this process. There are dynamics that can get in the way including a lack of honesty or commitment to the process, power imbalances, unrealistic expectations, insufficient time, or an unwillingness to compromise. Some people are more transactional, confrontational, or focused on winning rather than creating mutual resolution. Conflicts can also be sustained by factors such as inequality, resource scarcity, political factors, lack of trust, cultural issues, and emotional entrenchment in a respective position. In some cases, there has been too much damage, in which case forgiveness and reconciliation must be established before moving toward conflict resolution.

Solidarity—that is, creating a commonality of understanding, feelings, and purpose—is a powerful force for conflict resolution. When collaboration , empathy, trust, and shared commitment are implemented, almost all conflicts can be resolved in equitable ways that promote healing and resilience .

Likert, R., & Likert, J. G. (1978). A Method for Coping With Conflict in Problem-Solving Groups. Group & Organization Studies , 3(4), 427–434. https://doi.org/10.1177/105960117800300406

Paxton, A., Roche, J. M., Ibarra, A. & Tanenhaus, M. K. (2021). Predictions of Miscommunication in Verbal Communication During Collaborative Joint Action. J Speech Lang Hear Res. , 64 (2), pp. 613–627. doi: 10.1044/2020_JSLHR-20-00137.

Leigh W. Jerome, Ph.D. , is a clinical psychologist, artist, and the founder and executive director of the non-profit art forum Relational Space.

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Collaborating Conflict Resolution Style: Everything You Need to Know

Conflict is an inherent and unavoidable aspect of both personal and professional interactions. The manner in which we manage these conflicts significantly impacts the health of those relationships and our collective achievements. This highlights the importance of effective conflict resolution .

The collaborative conflict resolution style is one of the most effective approaches to dealing with disagreements. This style emphasizes a win-win outcome for everyone involved. But what exactly does this mean, and how does it look in practice?

The collaborating conflict style champions cooperation. In this conflict style, all parties involved actively work together to find a solution that addresses everyone’s core concerns. This isn’t simply splitting the difference but digging deeper to uncover the underlying needs and interests of those in conflict. The goal is to reach a solution that satisfies everyone, strengthening relationships in the process.

It’s easy to mix up the collaborating style with the compromising style in conflict management. In the compromising style, each person gives up something to reach a middle ground. Collaboration, however, is about finding a creative solution that doesn’t require significant sacrifices for any of the parties.

The Importance of Collaborative Conflict Resolution in Today’s Complex World

Collaboration offers a powerful tool for navigating complex challenges. Here are five key reasons why this approach is essential:

1. Finding Sustainable, Win-Win Outcomes

The collaborative conflict style goes beyond quick fixes. It aims to uncover the root causes of a disagreement and develop a mutually acceptable solution that benefits all parties involved. This leads to more lasting resolutions, minimizing the likelihood of the same issues resurfacing.

2. Fostering Innovation and Creativity

When people feel heard and understood, they’re more willing to think outside the box. The collaborating style establishes a safe space for open communication, brainstorming, and exploration of unconventional solutions. This can unlock groundbreaking ideas that wouldn’t be possible under a confrontational conflict management style.

3. Building Stronger Relationships

Effective conflict resolution isn’t just about the immediate issue—it’s about nurturing relationships. The collaborating style emphasizes empathy and mutual respect. By working together to address challenges, the parties involved deepen their understanding of each other’s perspectives and build trust.

4. Promoting a More Harmonious Environment

The collaborating style has a positive ripple effect on the overall atmosphere. When individuals see collaborative approaches succeed, it fosters a culture of cooperation. This can lead to fewer instances of conflict, less reliance on adversarial strategies like the competing style, and a generally more supportive and productive environment.

5. Avoiding Escalation and Personal Attacks

Conflicts left unresolved can quickly descend into harmful territory. Instead of focusing on “winning,” collaboration emphasizes problem-solving. This reduces the tendency for defensiveness, blame, or personal attacks, often seen in the accommodating style or a combative conflict management style.

By choosing collaborating styles for conflict resolution over the accommodating style, we invest in productive problem-solving, innovation, stronger relationships, and a more positive, cooperative atmosphere.

How the Collaborating Conflict Resolution Style Manifests in the Workplace

The collaborating conflict style translates into tangible workplace practices. Here are five ways it comes to life, with examples to illustrate:

1. Prioritizing Open Dialogue

In a collaborative workplace, honest and respectful communication is the norm. Team members feel comfortable sharing their concerns, ideas, and opinions without fear of judgment. This open dialogue forms the foundation for addressing conflicts productively, leading to a better understanding of the challenges at hand.

Example: A team experiences tension over project deadlines. Instead of assigning blame, they hold a meeting where each member can voice their challenges and contribute to problem-solving.

2. Exploring Diverse Perspectives

Collaboration recognizes the value of different perspectives. It encourages active listening and consideration of all viewpoints. This approach often uncovers hidden insights and creates space for more comprehensive solutions.

Example: Two departments clash over resources. Instead of escalating the issue, a cross-departmental meeting is held to understand each team’s needs. This leads to the discovery of potential resource-sharing opportunities.

3. Emphasizing Shared Goals

The collaborating style shifts the focus from individual wins to collective success. It aligns the parties involved around a shared purpose and motivates them to find solutions that benefit the greater good.

Example: A marketing team member disagrees on campaign strategy. Instead of getting locked in internal competition, they revisit the campaign’s objectives, leading to a more cohesive and impactful approach.

4. Encourage Accountability and Shared Responsibility

A collaborative conflict management style empowers everyone involved to be part of the solution. This sense of shared responsibility naturally translates into greater accountability, as individuals are motivated to follow through on agreed-upon actions.

Example: A client expresses dissatisfaction with a delivered product. The team rallies together, avoiding finger-pointing, and works collaboratively to analyze feedback and create an improvement plan.

5. Proactive Problem-Solving vs. Reactivity

The collaborating style promotes moving away from the avoiding style or purely reactive conflict management approaches. It emphasizes seeking out and addressing potential issues early on, even before they escalate into major disputes.

Example: Instead of waiting for a performance issue to create conflict, a manager regularly meets with team members to proactively discuss bottlenecks and brainstorm alternative solutions to ensure a smooth workflow.

Adopting a collaborative conflict resolution approach can revolutionize the work environment. It replaces power struggles with teamwork, defensiveness with effective communication, and a focus on finding a middle ground with an emphasis on finding solutions that solve problems for everyone.

Examples of Situations Where the Collaborating Conflict Resolution Style Shines

The collaborating conflict style can be applied to various workplace situations, some of which include:

1. Resource Allocation Disputes

Departments or teams often conflict over shared resources, such as budget, personnel, or equipment. A collaborative approach involves all parties brainstorming ways to maximize the available resources, potentially leading to joint projects, staggered usage schedules, or resource pooling.

2. Strategic Disagreements

When teams or executives face major decision-making crossroads, differing opinions can create tension. The collaborating style establishes a forum for respectful debate and exploration of each viewpoint’s merits. This can lead to a hybrid solution that addresses everyone’s concerns and exceeds the quality of any single initial proposal.

3. Project Bottlenecks

Unexpected delays or obstacles in a project can quickly derail progress and lead to finger-pointing. Instead of getting stuck in blame games, the collaborating style brings the relevant team members together to identify the issue’s root cause and creatively re-strategize to get the project back on track.

4. Interpersonal Tensions

Conflicts between two employees can impact the whole team’s dynamic. A collaborative approach, facilitated by a manager or HR, helps individuals better understand each other’s perspectives, identify common ground points, and negotiate solutions that improve their working relationship.

5. Addressing Low Morale

A collaborative conflict management approach is crucial when a team or department experiences a significant amount of dissatisfaction or low morale. Leaders openly engage with employees to listen to their concerns, understand underlying challenges, and jointly develop strategies to improve the situation, which can resolve issues and build relationships and trust.

While the collaborating style is powerful, it’s not always the most suitable approach. It requires time and energy, making it less ideal for urgent or minor issues where other styles of conflict management might be a better fit.

Benefits of Collaborative Conflict Resolution Training for Individuals and Organizations

Collaborative skills don’t develop overnight. Targeted training provides individuals and organizations with the tools and framework to effectively adopt the collaborating conflict style.

1. Enhanced Problem-Solving Abilities

Collaborative conflict resolution training dives deep into techniques for identifying the root causes of conflict, active listening, and creative brainstorming. This translates into better solutions that address everyone’s interests and prevent problems from recurring.

2. Improved Communication and Relationship Building

The collaborating style emphasizes empathy, respectful communication, and acknowledging differing perspectives. Training helps individuals hone these skills, leading to stronger relationships inside and outside the workplace.

3. Increased Productivity and Efficiency

Unmanaged conflict wastes time, resources, and energy. By teaching an effective conflict management style , collaborative training enables individuals and teams to resolve issues quickly and efficiently, returning to core tasks with renewed focus.

4. Fostering a Culture of Collaboration

When individuals are more adept at collaboration, it creates a ripple effect throughout the organization. This leads to a more cooperative and supportive environment, reducing the likelihood of future conflicts and boosting overall productivity.

5. Boosted Morale and Employee Retention

A workplace where people feel heard, respected, and capable of resolving issues constructively is a more positive place to work. Collaborative training can lead to higher morale, job satisfaction, and employee loyalty.

While the collaborating conflict style can be more time-consuming than other approaches, like compromise, the benefits far outweigh the initial investment. By providing collaborative conflict resolution training, organizations and individuals invest in a lasting skillset that empowers them to achieve their goals sustainably and harmoniously. The effort put in upfront pays off tenfold in the long run.

Benefits of Conflict Resolution Training for People With the Collaborating Conflict Style

If you naturally gravitate toward the collaborating conflict style, you already possess valuable strengths in conflict resolution. You likely understand the importance of open communication, exploring differing perspectives, and working toward solutions that benefit all involved. However, even the most naturally collaborative individuals can benefit from targeted training.

1. Refining Your Skills

Training can help you become even better at collaborating. It can teach you specific techniques for active listening, facilitating discussions, and brainstorming creative solutions that might not come intuitively.

2. Understanding Other Styles

While your preferred approach is collaboration, training exposes you to other conflict management styles when conflict arises. This understanding helps you recognize the approaches of others and adapt your own communication for more effective interactions with the full spectrum of personalities.

3. Dealing With Difficult Situations

Even with a strong collaborative approach, you’ll initially encounter situations where a different style may be more appropriate. Training helps you recognize those situations and temporarily adopt a different tactic to de-escalate or pave the way for later collaborative solutions.

4. Addressing Your Own Biases

Everyone has blind spots. Training can help you become more aware of subconscious biases that might hinder your ability to truly hear another party, find common ground, or brainstorm innovative solutions.

5. Gaining Confidence in High-Stakes Conflicts

When focused on critical or important issues, stress and the emotional stakes can increase. Training provides a framework and practiced techniques that allow you to remain calm, focused, and collaborative under pressure.

The Power of Collaboration

The collaborative approach to conflict resolution builds stronger relationships, unlocks innovation, and creates a more positive work environment. Ready to enhance your collaborative conflict resolution skills? Contact AllWin Conflict Resolution Training today to explore our tailored solutions for individuals and teams.

About the Author: Jeremy Pollack

Jeremy Pollack, Ph.D. is the founder of Defuse De-Escalation Training, a sister company of Pollack Peacebuilding Systems, the largest workplace conflict resolution training and consulting firm in North America. He actively participates in de-escalation training and consulting initiatives for a variety of industries, from Fortune 500 companies to well-known non-profits. Besides his Ph.D. in Psychology from Grand Canyon University, Jeremy holds a Master’s Degree in Negotiation, Conflict Resolution, and Peacebuilding (NCRP) from California State University, Dominguez Hills. He is also a member of several organizations focused on conflict resolution and peacebuilding, such as the Peaceful Leadership Institute, the Association for Conflict Resolution, and the Division 48 (Division of Peace Psychology) of the American Psychological Association. Jeremy also holds several certifications in the field of training and coaching: he is a Certified Organizational Development Coach (CODC™), a Certified Clinical Trauma Specialist-Individual (CCTS-I™), and an Associate Certified Coach (ACC) under the International Coaching Federation.

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What is Conflict Resolution, and How Does It Work?

How to manage conflict at work through conflict resolution.

By Katie Shonk — on August 22nd, 2024 / Conflict Resolution

If you work with others, sooner or later you will almost inevitably face the need for conflict resolution. You may need to mediate a dispute between two members of your department. Or you may find yourself angered by something a colleague reportedly said about you in a meeting. Or you may need to engage in conflict resolution with a client over a missed deadline. In organizations, conflict is inevitable, and good conflict management tools are essential.

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What is conflict resolution, and how can you use it to settle disputes in your workplace?

Conflict resolution can be defined as the informal or formal process that two or more parties use to find a peaceful solution to their dispute.

A number of common cognitive and emotional traps, many of them unconscious, can exacerbate conflict and contribute to the need for conflict resolution:

• Self-serving fairness interpretations. Rather than deciding what’s fair from a position of neutrality, we interpret what would be most fair to us, then justify this preference on the bases of fairness. For example, department heads are likely to each think they deserve the lion’s share of the annual budget. Disagreements about what’s fairlead to clashes.

• Overconfidence. We tend to be overconfident in our judgments, a tendency that leads us to unrealistic expectations. Disputants are likely to be overconfident about their odds of winning a lawsuit, for instance, an error that can lead them to shun a negotiated settlement that would save them time and money.

• Escalation of commitment. Whether negotiators are dealing with a labor strike, a merger, or an argument with a colleague, they are likely to irrationally escalate their commitment to their chosen course of action, long after it has proven useful. We desperately try to recoup our past investments in a dispute (such as money spent on legal fees), failing to recognize that such “sunk costs” should play no role in our decisions about the future.

• Conflict avoidance. Because negative emotions cause us discomfort and distress, we may try to tamp them down, hoping that our feelings will dissipate with time. In fact, conflict tends to become more entrenched, and parties have a greater need for conflict resolution when they avoid dealing with their strong emotions.

Given these and other pitfalls, how can you set up a constructive conflict resolution process when dealing with conflict at work and other realms? Conflicts can be resolved in a variety of ways, including negotiation, mediation, arbitration, and litigation.

• Negotiation. In conflict resolution, you can and should draw on the same principles of collaborative negotiation that you use in dealmaking. For example, you should aim to explore the interests underlying parties’ positions, such as a desire to resolve a dispute without attracting negative publicity or to repair a damaged business relationship. In addition, determine your best alternative to a negotiated agreement , or BATNA —what you will do if you fail to reach an agreement, such as finding a new partner or filing a lawsuit. By brainstorming options and looking for tradeoffs across issues, you may be able to negotiate a satisfactory outcome to your dispute without the aid of outside parties.

• Mediation. In mediation, disputants enlist a trained, neutral third party to help them come to a consensus. Rather than imposing a solution, a professional mediator encourages disputants to explore the interests underlying their positions. Working with parties both together and separately, mediators seek to help them discover a resolution that is sustainable, voluntary, and nonbinding.

• Arbitration. In arbitration, which can resemble a court trial, a neutral third party serves as a judge who makes decisions to end the dispute. The arbitrator listens to the arguments and evidence presented by each side, then renders a binding and often confidential decision. Although disputants typically cannot appeal an arbitrator’s decision, they can negotiate most aspects of the arbitration process, including whether lawyers will be present and which standards of evidence will be used.

• Litigation. In civil litigation, a defendant and a plaintiff face off before either a judge or a judge and jury, who weigh the evidence and make a ruling. Information presented in hearings and trials usually enters the public record. Lawyers typically dominate litigation, which often ends in a negotiated settlement during the pretrial period.

In general, it makes sense to start off less-expensive, less-formal conflict resolution procedures, such as negotiation and mediation, before making the larger commitments of money and time that arbitration and litigation often demand. Conflict-resolution training can further enhance your ability to negotiate satisfactory resolutions to your disputes.

What conflict resolution methods have you tried before? Leave us a comment.

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4 responses to “what is conflict resolution, and how does it work”.

Conflict resolution arise due to dispute between two parties involved in any trade , it can be solved with fair negotiation or through Mediator or through arbitrator or through litigation.

Wondful work keep up pls.

Conflict resolution is way of settling misundestanding between two or more bodies on a matter through dialog.

Conflict Resolution can also be defined as a strong will and determination to create solution to a misunderstanding between two or more parties

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11 Core Conflict Resolution Skills: Strategies And Phrases To Avoid

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Key Takeaways  

Should conflicts arise at work, it is essential to have conflict resolution skills to promote unity. Conflict resolution skills include:

• Being an active listener
• Having patience for others
• Effectively communicating your point of view and allowing others to do the same
• Keeping a positive mindset and attitude
• Remaining unbiased if you are mediating a conflict among others
• The three main types of disputes include employees, supervisors and employees, or employees and customers.

Everyone is different. Therefore, it’s not uncommon for people to have differences in opinions and points of view. These differences are what make collaborating successful, but also why problems happen once in a while. This is why conflict resolution skills are essential, especially in business. When employees are unable to work together, conflicts can arise. This can lead to company’s being unable to achieve their goals and have a high employee turnaround.

Conflicts are inevitable, but conflict resolution skills can make the conflict less destructive. When conflict arises in the workplace, it’s important to consider your words and phrasing carefully. This is because many conflicts arise from misunderstandings or miscommunication. Whether you’re trying to stop a conflict or resolve one that has already started, there are several conflict resolution skills that you should know about.

In this article, we will go over some of these skills as well as provide examples of how they could be implemented when dealing with conflict in the workplace!

What is Conflict Resolution?

Conflict resolution is a prevention and handling strategy. It involves trying to resolve conflicts by understanding why the conflict exists in the first place, what it’s really about, and how you can approach it so that both parties are happy with its outcome. This means talking things out rather than ignoring them or letting small issues grow into larger ones! Conflict resolution is successful when parties put their differences aside to be productive.

Most Common Conflicts the Occur in the Workplace 

The three most common examples of workplace conflict are:

• Between employees in a business
• Amongst managers and employees
• Between employees of a business and its clients

11 Core Conflict Resolution Skills

Here is the list of the 10 most important conflict resolution skills as chosen by our team here at Professional Leadership Institute.

1. Be an Active Listener

One of the most essential practical conflict resolution skills is active listening. To be an active listener, one must be focused on what the other person is saying. Rather than listening to respond, you must listen to understand the other person’s point of view. This will help you move past any confusion to get closer to a solution.

• Listen to why the other person is upset
• Make sure you understand what the other person is telling you
• Do not interrupt when the other person is talking
• Repeat what you heard back to them to understand better

2. Have Patience for Others

Next on our list of conflict resolution skills is having patience. Sometimes, challenges or disputes can be rushed towards a solution. Therefore, you must practice patience. Everyone wants to be correct and have their opinion validated. Therefore, you will need to consider all points of view and have patience until a problem is solved correctly.

3. Effective Communication

  When coming to a solution, communication is key . Therefore, to have conflict resolution skills that are effective, you must be willing to talk openly with others. When a problem or dispute arises, all parties need to give their point of view. This also helps promote healthy partnerships where transparency is valued.

4. Keep an Optimistic Mindset

Another skill that individuals should have when solving a problem is to have an optimistic mindset. During challenges, it is easy to become pessimistic. Therefore, when we remain positive, we can keep the conversation moving towards solving the problem rather than hit more issues along the way.

5. Remain Unbiased at all Times

Lastly, another one of the critical conflict resolution skills that you should practice is remaining unbiased. By being impartial, one must separate the problem from those involved. Look at the challenges or disputes at hand and focus on working through each hurdle rather than the personalities of each person.

6. Don’t take things personally

When conflict arises at work, many people take it personally. As a result, they will become defensive and look to protect themselves rather than focusing on the issue that is in front of them. Therefore, when conflict happens do not get personal with what is being said or done during this time.

7. Observe the body language of others

Not only conflict resolution skills, but nonverbal communication is important to keep in mind. If you disagree with someone or something they said, it might be easy for them to get the wrong idea about your stance on this topic if you don’t say anything at all! So do not just stand there and let things continue – speak up and communicate that what was said does not reflect how you feel/what you want. You can start by saying: “I hear what you’re saying…” Then go from there depending on where the conversation takes place!

8. Focus on the current problem

If you just focus on what happened in the past, there is no way that a solution will be found. In fact, dwelling on old challenges can result in even more issues cropping up so keep your head up and look towards resolving this issue!

9. Don’t get baited into reacting emotionally or raising your voice

When conflict arises, if you start to feel yourself going off the deep end it is best to stop and take a step back. The last thing anyone wants is for conflict resolution skills to go out the window because of emotions! So before reacting think about how you want others around you or your organization as a whole will benefit from this conversation being resolved in one way or another.

– Avoid saying: “I’m not emotional.” This implies that someone else might be which can lead to conflict/feels like they’re being attacked; instead say something more factual such as “this feels really important” then move on from there (or avoid using words that bring up feelings altogether).

10. Be humble enough to apologize/forgive the other person

If conflict resolution skills are not being used it is likely because of one thing – no one likes to be wrong. This might lead to conflict if someone doesn’t apologize or recognize that they were at fault for something which can make the other party feel unheard and frustrated. So think about how you would want someone else in your shoes to act, then do just that by saying sorry when necessary!

11. Agree to disagree and move forward

No conflict resolution skill is more important than this one – learning how to be okay with not having the perfect solution, especially when it comes down to working together as a team!

A good way to resolve conflict in the workplace is to ask the question. “Does your behaviour violate our core values?” Using your company’s core values as the ultimate truth for what is acceptable behaviour is a good way of preventing conflicts. Take our free course preview on “Discovering and Implementing Your Core Values”

Phrases to Avoid Saying

– Avoid using words like never or always; these are absolute terms that will most likely create conflict/feelings of disagreement (ex: “You’re never on time.”) instead use more specific language such as “rarely” or “sometimes.”

– Avoid word choice such as nagging/lecturing so avoid like “you should have known better” or “you should have done better.”

– Avoid using “you” or personal pronouns when talking about someone else because these are insulting/hurtful; instead use names or neutral terms to describe them (ex: partners)

Strategies to Help You Resolve Active Conflicts

Now that we’ve gone over some of the most essential conflict resolution skills let’s look at how you can resolve any conflict effectively. This can work in both personal and work settings.

1. Stay as Calm as Possible

  When dealing with a problem or dispute, it is common to feel frustration. The most important thing to do is remain as calm as possible. Take a few deep breaths and approach the situation at hand with a clear mind.

2. Discuss the Conflict in Private

The next thing you should do is find a private space where you can discuss the conflict. All parties involved should be able to sit comfortably in their own area throughout the room.

3. Acknowledge the Conflict

Once everyone is comfortable, you should then acknowledge that there is a problem at hand. This is where you can use some of your conflict resolution skills. All people to speak their minds respectfully and listen actively. Get to learn people’s perspectives and learn why the problem has come to be.

4. Agree to Work Together to Find a Solution

Now that everyone has given their point of view, all parties need to agree to find a solution. This will only occur when people work together to resolve the problem at hand.

5. Learn to Compromise and Build a Plan

When coming up with a plan of action, all parties must learn to compromise. You must put aside your differences and prioritize the solution. Therefore, it’s essential to realize that your point of view may not be accepted entirely or at all.

6. Follow-Up With all Parties Involved

Once the resolution has been reached, you should then make an effort to check in with all employees to make sure the agreement is working. This ensures employees know what is expected of them. It also allows you to make changes if something is not working.

7. Speak with Your HR Department

If employees refuse to follow the solution plan, the best course of action is to contact your HR department should the conflict escalate. They will then use their own conflict resolution skills to see if a resolution can be found. Alternatively, they will utilize other forms of methods to ensure the problem does not occur again.

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Share Your Conflict Story (Without Sounding Like a Drama Queen)

This guide will show you how to transform tough moments into powerful stories that highlight your leadership, emotional intelligence, and problem-solving skills—without the theatrics..

We’ve all been there. Sitting across from a hiring manager, trying to answer that dreaded interview question:

“Tell me about a time you had a conflict with someone.”

It’s the moment your mind races:

Do I tell them about the time my coworker threw me under the bus? The time my manager micromanaged me into oblivion? Or that client who changed the entire scope at the last second and blamed me for the delays?

Here’s the deal: this question isn’t about spilling workplace drama. It’s a trap disguised as a test. A test of your self-awareness, your communication skills, and—most importantly—your ability to handle friction professionally.

Here’s the playbook to ace this question and turn conflict into your strength.

1. Don’t Throw Anyone Under the Bus

It’s tempting to paint yourself as the hero and the other person as the villain. But resist that urge. Interviewers aren’t looking for a soap opera. They’re looking for maturity.

The key? Balance honesty with diplomacy.

Your answer should show that you’re aware of your own role in the conflict—no matter how small. Skip the blame game and focus on what you did to turn things around.

Example Setup:

“We were on a tight deadline, and tensions were high. A team member and I disagreed on how to prioritize tasks. I felt my approach would keep us on schedule, but they saw things differently.”

Notice what’s missing?

No personal attacks, no dramatics—just setting the stage.

2. Show Your Problem-Solving Skills in Action

Here’s the pivot. This question is less about the conflict itself and more about how you handle it.

Do you blow up? Do you go silent? Or do you lean in, find common ground, and solve the problem?

Highlight the steps you took to defuse the situation.

Did you initiate a one-on-one chat? Did you ask for their perspective? Did you find a middle ground that worked for both of you?

Example Middle:

“I realized we weren’t getting anywhere by debating, so I suggested we take a step back and each explain our perspective. We found that we had the same goal but different approaches. That’s when I proposed a hybrid solution that combined our ideas, keeping the best parts of both.”

This shows you’re proactive. You own the problem, you communicate, and you find a way through.

3. Focus on the Resolution and What You Learned

Wrap it up by highlighting the positive outcome.

Did you meet the deadline? Did you build a stronger relationship with that colleague? What was the win?

And then, add a cherry on top: what did you learn?

This is where you connect the story back to your growth, showing the interviewer that every conflict is a chance to sharpen your skills.

Example Wrap-Up:

“Not only did we deliver the project on time, but the experience also taught me the importance of stepping back and understanding others’ viewpoints. Now, I make it a point to seek input early to avoid these situations. It made me a better collaborator.”

Now, instead of just telling a conflict story, you’ve demonstrated leadership, emotional intelligence, and problem-solving—all without sounding like a walking HR incident.

The Formula: Conflict → Action → Resolution → Learning

Every conflict is an opportunity disguised as an obstacle. Show them that you are beyond surviving friction—you thrive in it. You don’t get defensive; you get strategic.

So, next time you face this question, tell a story of your growth.

Because that’s what they really want to hear.

Identify the conflict without blaming

Show the actions you took to resolve it

Tie it back to the positive outcome and personal growth

Thanks for reading. Best of luck in your interviews!

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12 Essential Conflict Resolution Skills for Kids: Tools for Peaceful Problem Solving

WHY WE NEED TO TEACH KIDS CONFLICT RESOLUTION SKILLS

As a mom of two and a former school counselor, I can’t stress enough how important it is to teach kids about healthy conflict resolution skills. I mean if you’re a parent or are someone who works with children on a daily basis, then I’m preaching to the choir, right? We all know the hard truth that conflict is inevitable.  It’s part of living.  And since there’s no way around it, knowing how to handle conflict in healthy and respectful ways is a critical life skill that will serve our kids well into adulthood.

Now some will argue that kids will figure it out on their own. And the part of me that sees the not-so-great-things that happen with helicopter parenting, agrees that there is no doubt some truth to that. 

At the same time, as someone who has seen my fair share of playground scuffles and classroom drama, I do believe that without guidance, kids are more likely to resort to name-calling, hitting, or other aggressive behaviors when they’re angry, hurt, or frustrated.

So, what can we do as parents, teachers, and school counselors? We can teach our kids how to handle conflict in a way that’s respectful, assertive, and productive. 

Here are a few reasons why this is so important:

Prevention of Small Issues Escalating

First of all, healthy conflict resolution skills can prevent small issues from turning into bigger ones. Let’s say your child feels frustrated with a friend who keeps interrupting her while she’s trying to talk. Without the skills to address the issue in a respectful way, your child might start avoiding the friend.  Or worse, she might lash out with hurtful comments. On the other hand, if your child knows how to assertively communicate her needs and boundaries by using I-Statements, for instance, she can address the issue head-on.  And this means there’s a good change it would prevent the conflict from escalating.

Strengthens Relationships

Secondly, healthy conflict resolution skills helps kids to build stronger relationships. When conflicts arise,  kids get to practice empathy, active listening, and problem-solving. When working through conflicts in healthy and respectful ways, kids can develop deeper connections and a stronger sense of trust.

Boosts Self-Efficacy and Self-Esteem

Finally, healthy conflict resolution skills can help kids build self-confidence and self-esteem. When kids feel empowered to handle conflicts in a productive way, they’re more likely to speak up for themselves in an assertive way, advocate for their needs, and set boundaries. These skills can help children feel more in control of their lives, by focusing on what is within their control as compared to outside of it.  This leads to children feeling more confident in their ability to handle whatever difficult situations that come their way.

12 Conflict Resolution Skills to Teach Are….

And since I’m all about tools and action, here’s a list of 12 essential conflict resolution skills every kid (teens and adults, too!) should know.

1. Get Calm First

Teaching kids to get calm before dealing with a conflict is essential.  That’s because, when emotions are running high, and the protective part of their brain is sounding the alarm, it’s pretty difficult to communicate effectively and make thoughtful decisions. When you take some time to calm down, you can better regulate your emotions, think clearly, and approach the conflict with a more level-headed state of mind.  

Some of the calming strategies I used to teach my students were breathing exercises like Hot Cocoa Breathing and Roller Coaster Breathing (which some people know as 5 Finger Breathing), counting to twenty and back, walking away and taking a short break before addressing the issue.

2. Find a Win-Win Solution

If you can, encourage your children (or students) to see if you can find a solution that works for everyone involved. That’s what we call a win-win solution! 

A win-win solution means that best case scenario, both people get what they want or need.  Worst case scenario, both people compromise, and at a minimum, feel at least okay with the outcome. 

So how to find a win-win solution? Each person can talk about their feelings, wants, and hopes.   And then together, brainstorm solutions.  Devise a compromise, if needed. And then make a deal that everyone can agree on.  

3. Play a Game of Chance like Rock-Paper-Scissors

Playing a game of chance to resolve a conflict is often a favorite for kiddos.  (Play just seems to make everything a bit less serious and a whole lot more better, right?) Basically, whoever wins gets to decide what to do and/or go first.  

Some fun games of chance include: Rock-Paper-Scissors, coin toss, dice roll, and odds & evens.

4. Ask for Help

Asking an adult for help can be a valuable tool for resolving conflicts and addressing issues that may feel too big for a child to handle on their own. If a child is dealing with a situation that makes them feel scared, unsafe, or if someone else is being harmed, it is essential to reach out to an adult for assistance.

It’s important to teach children to recognize what constitutes a big problem versus a small problem.  For instance, someone rolling her eyes at you is not at the same level as someone threatening to fight you after school. Getting bullied or feeling unsafe requires immediate attention from an adult. 

And say the problem is more of a medium or small sized one?  It still important to remind children that they don’t have to face challenging situations alone.  That you have their back.  And can help them come up with solutions and strategies to address the conflict effectively.  

Another general rule of thumb is I would suggest that they ask for help and talk with an adult  if they have tried 2 or 3 problem solving tricks independently and still feel stuck.  

5. Ignore What’s Annoying You

Easier said than done.  But with enough practice, ignoring the little silly stuff can actually be quite powerful in the sense that it immediately will deescalate a conflict.

Brainstorm with your children or students different times this strategy would be effective.  Add some humor, too!  Some ideas:

When your brother is chewing loudly or making weird noises at the dinner table, try to ignore the bizarre sounds and instead focus on your own meal. You could even imagine that he’s just pretending to be a cartoon character while he eats.

If your friend keeps interrupting you while you’re talking, try to take a deep breath and keep going. Imagine that she’s a robot that is so excited to tell you information that she can’t help but blurt out.

If your classmate is tapping his foot, try to tune it out the sound and focus on your work. Imagine that he is practicing for a tap dance performance and try to enjoy the rhythm.

• Take a deep breath and try not to react.
• Keep doing what you were doing.
• Don’t say anything.
• Look the other way.

6. Talk It Out and Use I-Statements

This is a must conflict resolution skill not just for kids, but for people of ALL ages.

An “I-Statement” is a method of communication that helps children express their feelings and needs in a clear, assertive, and respectful way.  It avoid blaming or making accusations of another person.  It often involves making a statement that begins with “I” (although it doesn’t have to) and describes how a particular situation is impacting that person. It also often includes a statement that expresses how that person would like to be treated and/or what that person wants, needs, or hopes for.

Basically, to teach this skill, you really want to break down the different parts.  Practice, practice, practice.  And of course, model it as often as you can.

7. Say Words that Mean “No”

Use a strong and respectful voice to say you are not okay with something.  Or another way of thinking about this skill that it is the assertive boundary setting declaration.  When kids say “no,” they are communicating their limits and expectations in a clear and confident manner. This can also help prevent misunderstandings by setting expectations from the start.

Situations when this conflict resolution skills would work well include when someone is asking them to do something they don’t want to do or when someone is trying to take something from them without permission.

Some “No” Words Are:

• “Stop.”
• “I am not ok with that.”
• “Not now.”
• “Don’t bother.”
• “No thanks.”
• “No.”

8. Take Turns or Share

This is one of those “everything I ever needed to learn I learned in kindergarten” sort or rule.  The basics are: s hare what you both want to use, e ach person takes a turn, and have fun p laying together.  You could jazz up examples such as:

• Imagine if you had to eat the entire large pizza by yourself, without sharing with your siblings…You might get a really huge belly ache!
• Taking turns can be like taking a break in a marathon or track meet. It gives everyone a chance to catch your breath and get ready for the next round.

Imagine if you had to play a game of catch alone, without anyone to receive the ball? You’d just be throwing the ball up in the air…..and watching it fall down again, with no one to pass it back to you. How fun would that be?

9. Do Something Else

Doing something else helps kids to shift their focus away from a potential conflict,  and instead re-focus their attention towards something positive.

Some examples you could share with kiddos include:

• Say you and your cousin both want to play with the same toy, you could find another toy to play with or even suggest something you could both do together,  like build a pillow fort. 
• If you are playing a game at recess and don’t like how some of your friends are playing, you could find something else to do, like shoot basketball hoops or climb the jungle gym.
• If you feel like your brothers are leaving you our or excluding you, do something else like taking your dog on a walk or riding your bike.

Doing something else looks like: 

Find something else to do.

Be flexible and creative.

Play a different game.

Use something different.

10. Listen to the Other Person

This is a hard one…not just for kids, but for adults too.  It can be challenging to pause and really hear what the other person is saying, especially if you feel offended, wronged, or hurt.  

When children listen actively, it helps them to:

• acknowledge and validate the other person’s emotions
• better understand the other person’s perspective
• clarify misunderstandings
• work together to find a solution that gets closer in meeting everyone’s needs

11. Put Yourself In the Other Person’s Shoes

One of the most essential conflict resolution skills for kids is empathy.   Being able to put yourself in someone else’s shoes helps kids to understand the  other person’s perspective, cultivate better communication skills, build positive relationships, and even reduce the chances for hurtful behavior.

12. Apologize

Last but not least, it’s important to teach kids how to apologize.  Apologizing is an important conflict resolution skill for kids because it helps them take responsibility for their actions.  In addition, it’s a way they can express remorse, and make repairs for any harm they may have caused.  

Making a meaningful apology takes practice.  There’s a big difference between saying, “I’m sorry you feel sad” versus “I’m sorry that I called you mean name.  What I did was hurtful.  And I would like to make it up to you.”

Step By Step Guide to Deal with Conflict for Kids

Recognizing how it take lots of practice to develop problem solving skills, on top of seeing  how time consuming it could get for teachers who were  constantly mediating conflicts between students,  I created a conflict resolution lap book that takes children through each step.  It’s  interactive, hands-on nature, coupled with strong visual supports, help empower students to become independent problem solvers. 

This lap book has kids:

• Choose a coping tool to get calm first. The calming strategies include Hand Over Heart, Cocoa Breathing, Count to 20, Roller Coaster Breathing, Rocks & Socks, and Ocean Waves Breathing, all with strong visual supports and directions.
• Reflect on the size of the problem.  If it is a big problem, get an adult to help! But if it’s something you can handle on your own….
• Choose a conflict resolution tool…and give it a try.  
• If using an I-Message, kids can use the hands-on template on the back of the lap book to formulate the statement.  
• After trying out the conflict resolution strategy, reflect on whether or not it helped.  If not, don’t worry – the lap book also includes prompts to suggest trying another skill. 

Some of the feedback I have gotten from teachers is that this step-by-step guide has been a game changer in their classrooms.  That it has been very helpful for students dealing with conflict since it provides students with essential tools to help them resolve conflicts on their own. Plus, because it is interactive, it helps students regulate their emotions when triggered by frustrating social interactions. 

Take a look below! I’d love to hear what you think!  And would especially love to hear any tips of tricks you’ve used to teach kids conflict resolution skills, too!!

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12 principles of a problem solving approach to conflict resolution

(Created with Wordle )

I’ve recently been involved with a couple of community groups experiencing conflict. In fact I don’t think I’ve ever been involved in an ongoing group that hasn’t had some conflict. A group without conflict is probably in danger of stagnation.

What’s important is how we respond to conflict.

I find a problem solving approach to conflict can be particularly useful when working with groups, families and communities. The following are 12 principles that can help in adopting a problem solving approach to conflict.

1.  Conflict is seen as a normal part of life. People often try to avoid conflict and see it as being destructive, painful or unconstructive. Conflict, however, can be seen as a normal part of life that is neither positive nor negative. What is important is how we respond to conflict. Conflict can actually encourage change and growth. If we deal with conflict before it becomes a crisis, it can be easier to resolve — so avoidance might not always be the best way forward.

2.  A problem solving approach requires cooperation rather than competition. In a problem solving approach, the emphasis is on working together to overcome a problem. Conflict is thus not seen as a competition or a contest, and the people involved are encouraged to be collaborators rather than opponents. Although not all conflicts can be resolved in ways which everybody is totally happy, at least we might be able to agree to a process that will allow us to move forward.

3.  It is important to respect the interests and needs of both yourself and the other party(s). A cooperative approach is more likely to be successful if the people involved don’t just focus on what they want, but also consider what the other people want as well. A focus only on your own interests is less likely to lead to an outcome that everyone can accept.

4.  The aim is to find an outcome that everybody involved can at least accept . In order to promote cooperation, the aim of a problem solving approach is to find an outcome everybody can accept; ideally a win/win. Although there are conflicts involving mutually exclusive needs, especially those involving limited resources, there are many situations where it is possible to find “win/win” solutions. Even if we might not be totally happy with the outcome, we might be able to accept it as fair or reasonable.

5.  It can be helpful, particularly in the early stages, to focus on interests (or needs) rather than solutions (or positions). Conflict is more likely to be resolved if we start with a focus on interests or needs rather than solutions or positions. Whilst there are some deep-rooted human needs which cannot be compromised, by exploring the underlying needs and interests first, a number of solutions which satisfy everybody can often be found. Initial solutions or positions might be mutually exclusive, but once the underlying needs are explored, alternative solutions might be possible.

6.  The role of communication in conflict is vital. A lot of conflict is the result of poor communication or miscommunication, and clear communication can assist in conflict resolution. Strategies such as I messages and active listening can help promote clear communication.

7.  Analysis is an important part of conflict resolution. An analytical approach can allow conflict to be approached in a rational and logical manner. Being clear about things such as the characteristics of the parties involved, their prior relationship, the nature of the issues involved, and the consequences of the conflict can make a big difference.

8.  Emotions are a vital part of conflict and need to be addressed. Even though a rational and logical approach helps, it is important to recognise that emotions also play a major role in conflict and cannot be ignored. Unless we address the emotional context of conflict, it may be very hard to proceed. For example, an apology often plays a very important role in moving forward.

9.  Self-awareness helps one to respond effectively to conflict. If we are aware of things like how we react to conflict, how other people respond to us and our communication style, we are more likely to be able to respond positively to conflict. Self-awareness also help us to deal with hidden, underlying or unconscious aspects of conflict.

10.  Conflict is not always easily resolved and we need to accept that not everybody uses a cooperative approach to conflict. This means it is important to explore ways of dealing with difficult situations and people. At time is may help to use a neutral third-party to help with mediation.

11.  Despite problems or provocation, it helps to maintain a cooperative approach, to remain open to new possibilities and to seek a fair or just solution. Even when someone is acting in ways which makes it hard to resolve the conflict constructively, it can help if we remain caring and fair and see the other person as being worthy of care and justice. Sometimes a negative response can suggest that we need to pay more attention to the emotional context before moving on to try to address the other issues involved.

12.  It helps to remain positive and optimistic. Even when things are going badly, we are more likely to be able to resolve the conflict successfully if we believe it can be done. By remaining positive and optimistic, possibilities can emerge that we might otherwise miss.

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Families, community engagement and environmental sustainability – for parents, students, practitioners and anyone who wants to make a difference. By Graeme Stuart from Newcastle Australia .

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Conflict Resolution: Skills, Definition and Examples

14 min read · Updated on June 08, 2023

Master the art of conflict resolution and unlock the key to harmonious workplaces

In today's fast-paced and dynamic work environments, conflicts are bound to arise. Whether it's a difference in opinions, clashing personalities, or opposing interests, conflicts can disrupt productivity, strain relationships, and create a negative atmosphere. That's where conflict resolution skills come into play.

You can use the conflict resolution examples in this article to learn how to address and resolve disagreements, disputes, and tensions in a constructive and mutually beneficial manner. It involves employing a set of essential skills that enable individuals to navigate conflicts, find common ground, and reach satisfactory resolutions. These skills encompass active listening, effective communication, emotional intelligence, and problem-solving.

In the following sections, we'll delve deeper into the key skills for resolving conflicts, explore the three Cs of conflict resolution, discuss the main conflict resolution skills, and provide practical tips and techniques to enhance your conflict resolution repertoire. 

Let's unlock the power of conflict resolution and pave the way for a more cohesive and successful workplace.

Understanding the importance of conflict resolution

Possessing strong conflict resolution skills is more than just a valuable asset in the workplace; it's a necessity for fostering healthy relationships, teamwork, and a positive organizational culture. When conflicts are effectively managed, teams can maintain focus, collaborate more efficiently, and achieve their goals with greater synergy.

One of the primary benefits of honing conflict resolution skills is the ability to prevent conflicts from escalating into larger, more disruptive issues. By addressing conflicts early on and with finesse, individuals can nip potential problems in the bud and maintain a harmonious work environment. Strong conflict resolution skills also foster open lines of communication, trust, and respect among team members, enhancing overall morale and job satisfaction.

Furthermore, possessing these skills enables individuals to navigate challenging conversations and delicate situations with confidence, poise, and empathy. It allows for the development of creative solutions and win-win outcomes, where both parties feel heard and their needs are met.

Conflict Resolution Skills Definition

Conflict resolution skills are vital tools for navigating professional settings. They are defined as skills that enable peaceful outcomes to disputes. These skills involve various strategies and techniques aimed at finding common ground, promoting effective communication, and achieving mutually beneficial resolutions. By developing these skills, you can proactively manage conflicts, prevent escalation, and cultivate a positive work environment.

What are conflict resolution skills?

Skill 1: active listening.

One of the best examples of conflict resolution skills is active listening. It involves fully engaging with the speaker, not only hearing their words but also understanding their underlying emotions and concerns. By attentively listening, you  demonstrate empathy , respect, and a genuine desire to comprehend the other person's perspective.

In conflict situations, active listening helps to de-escalate tension and foster open communication. Practice active listening by:

Maintaining eye contact

Nodding to show understanding

Paraphrasing or summarizing the speaker's points

These techniques ensure that both parties feel heard and valued, laying the groundwork for constructive dialogue and resolution.

Skill 2: Effective communication

Effective communication is essential for resolving conflicts. It encompasses both verbal and non-verbal forms of expression. Clear and  assertive communication  helps to convey your thoughts, needs, and concerns while also encouraging others to express themselves openly.

To improve communication skills in conflict situations, it's crucial to be mindful of your tone and body language. Choose your words carefully, avoiding confrontational or accusatory language. Be attentive to  non-verbal  cues, such as facial expressions and gestures, as they can significantly impact how your message is received.

Skill 3: Emotional intelligence

Emotional intelligence plays a vital role in conflict resolution. It involves recognizing, understanding, and managing emotions - both your own and those of others. By developing emotional intelligence, you can navigate conflicts with empathy, self-awareness, and self-control.

In conflict situations, emotional intelligence allows you to regulate your emotions, preventing impulsive reactions that may escalate tensions. It also enables you to understand the underlying emotions of others, fostering empathy and facilitating a more compassionate approach to conflict resolution.

One of the best things you can do to  enhance emotional intelligence  in conflicts is to practice self-reflection and self-awareness. Take a moment to identify your emotions and understand their impact on your behavior. Cultivate empathy by putting yourself in the other person's shoes, considering their perspective, and acknowledging their feelings.

Skill 4: Problem solving and collaboration

Problem solving and collaboration are crucial skills for resolving conflicts effectively. By adopting a collaborative approach, you shift the focus from "winning" the argument to finding mutually beneficial solutions.

In conflict resolution, problem solving techniques such as brainstorming, identifying common goals, and exploring alternative options can help to break down barriers and encourage collaboration. Foster an environment of open dialogue, where individuals feel comfortable sharing ideas and working together towards a resolution.

Additionally, fostering collaboration involves promoting active participation, valuing diverse viewpoints, and encouraging compromise. When people work together to solve problems, conflicts can be transformed into opportunities for growth, innovation, and strengthened relationships.

The three Cs of conflict resolution

Possessing these skills leads directly to the three Cs - calmness (sometimes referred to as composure), communication, and compromise. Understanding and employing the three Cs of conflict resolution can help you to achieve mutually agreeable solutions. 

C - Calmness

Maintaining calmness during conflicts is essential for productive resolution. When emotions run high, it becomes difficult to think clearly and communicate effectively. By staying calm and composed, you create a conducive environment for constructive dialogue and problem-solving.

Techniques for staying calm and composed in tense situations include:

Taking deep breaths: Deep breathing helps to regulate your body's stress response, allowing you to stay centered and focused

Practicing mindfulness: By bringing your attention to the present moment, mindfulness helps you to detach from strong emotions and approach conflicts with greater clarity

Using self-soothing techniques: Engage in activities that help you to relax and reduce stress, such as going for a walk, listening to calming music, or practicing meditation

C - Communication

Effective communication is the backbone of conflict resolution. It involves expressing yourself clearly, actively listening to others, and promoting understanding.

Practical tips for communicating constructively during conflicts include:

Using "I" statements: Express your feelings, thoughts, and needs using "I" statements to avoid sounding accusatory or confrontational. For example, say, "I feel frustrated when..." instead of "You always..."

Practicing active listening: Give your full attention to the speaker, maintain eye contact, and avoid interrupting. Show empathy by acknowledging their feelings and summarizing their points to ensure accurate understanding.

Seeking clarification: If something is unclear, ask open-ended questions to gather more information and promote deeper understanding. This demonstrates your genuine interest in resolving the conflict.

C - Compromise

Compromise is a crucial element of conflict resolution, as it involves finding solutions that satisfy the needs and interests of all parties involved.

To achieve an effective compromise, consider the following guidance:

Identify common ground: Look for shared interests or goals that can serve as a foundation for finding a middle ground. Focus on areas where you can work together to find a solution that addresses everyone's concerns.

Practice active problem-solving: Collaborate with the other party to brainstorm creative solutions. Encourage the exploration of alternatives and evaluate the pros and cons of each option.

Be willing to give and take: Recognize that compromise requires flexibility and a willingness to make concessions. Strive for a solution that may not be perfect but meets the core needs of both parties.

Remember, compromise does not mean surrendering or sacrificing your values. Instead, it involves finding a balance that allows for progress and resolution while respecting the perspectives and needs of all involved.

In the next section, we explore the five main conflict resolution strategies, expanding your repertoire of tools for resolving conflicts in the workplace.

Main conflict resolution strategies

Conflicts in the workplace can vary in complexity and intensity. To effectively resolve conflicts, it is important to have a repertoire of strategies at your disposal. Here, we will explore the five main conflict resolution strategies, providing you with valuable tools to navigate conflicts and promote positive outcomes.

Strategy 1: Collaborative problem solving

Collaborative problem solving is a strategy that emphasizes teamwork, open communication, and the active involvement of all parties in finding a resolution. This approach promotes a cooperative atmosphere and encourages the exploration of mutually beneficial solutions.

Steps and examples for implementing this strategy include:

Identify the problem: Clearly define the underlying issue and ensure all parties have a shared understanding of the conflict

Generate alternative solutions: Brainstorm possible solutions together, encouraging creativity and a free exchange of ideas - consider both individual and collective interests

Evaluate options: Assess the pros and cons of each proposed solution, considering the impact on all parties involved; aim for solutions that address the core needs and concerns of everyone

Collaborate on decision-making: Select the solution that best meets the shared interests and goals identified during the process. Strive for consensus or a general agreement that everyone can accept

For example, imagine your team is experiencing conflicts over project timelines. By engaging in collaborative problem solving, team members can openly discuss their concerns, propose adjustments to deadlines, and collectively decide on a revised timeline that considers individual workloads and priorities.

Strategy 2: Compromise and negotiation

Compromise and negotiation are strategies that involve finding a middle ground and reaching agreement. These strategies require flexibility, effective communication, and a willingness to give and take.

Principles and techniques for implementing compromise and negotiation strategies include:

Identify shared goals: Focus on common interests and seek outcomes that align with the overarching objectives of the organization or team

Prioritize needs: Understand the core needs of each party and explore potential trade-offs that can address those needs to a reasonable extent

Explore alternative solutions: Encourage open dialogue to generate creative options that accommodate different perspectives and preferences

Seek win-win solutions: Aim for outcomes that result in mutual gains, rather than one party prevailing over the other - this approach fosters cooperation and strengthens relationships

For instance, imagine two departments in your organization disagree on the allocation of resources. Through compromise and negotiation, they can engage in constructive discussions, explore different resource distribution models, and eventually reach an agreement that balances the needs and priorities of both departments.

Strategy 3: Assertiveness 

Assertiveness is an important skill in conflict resolution. It involves expressing your thoughts, needs, and concerns in a clear and respectful manner while actively listening to others. Assertive communication promotes understanding, prevents miscommunication, and fosters productive dialogue.

Tips for assertive communication include:

Use clear and direct language: State your points in a concise and straightforward manner, avoiding ambiguity or vagueness

Maintain composure: Stay calm and composed, even when faced with challenging or confrontational behavior; respond rather than react, and focus on the issues at hand

Actively listen: Give others the opportunity to express their viewpoints fully, demonstrating respect and genuine interest; paraphrase and summarize their points to ensure accurate understanding

Strive for mutually beneficial solutions: Look for solutions that meet everyone's needs, promoting mutual understanding and cooperation

By practicing assertiveness, conflicts can be addressed head-on, enabling effective problem-solving and resolution.

Strategy 4: Avoidance and accommodation

In certain situations,  avoidance or accommodation  may be appropriate conflict resolution strategies. However, it's important to note that these strategies are most effective when used selectively and judiciously.

When considering avoidance or accommodation, keep the following in mind:

Timing is crucial: Sometimes, conflicts may be best resolved by allowing emotions to cool down before engaging in discussions; temporary avoidance can prevent further escalation

Relationship preservation: Accommodation can be useful when the relationship between parties is of the utmost importance and maintaining harmony takes precedence over personal desires

Potential drawbacks: Overuse of avoidance or accommodation can lead to unresolved conflicts, resentment, or a lack of assertiveness, which may hinder long-term productivity and satisfaction

Remember, while avoidance and accommodation can be useful in specific circumstances, they should not be relied upon as the primary means of conflict resolution.

Strategy 5: Mediation and facilitation

Mediation and facilitation involve the assistance of a neutral third party to guide the conflict resolution process. Mediators or facilitators help to enable open dialogue, maintain a balanced discussion, and foster a cooperative atmosphere.

Key aspects of mediation and facilitation in conflict resolution include:

Neutral and impartial guidance: The mediator or facilitator ensures a fair process by allowing all parties to express their concerns and viewpoints without bias

Active listening and reframing: The mediator or facilitator actively listens to each party, paraphrases their statements, and reframes them to promote understanding and perspective-taking

Encouraging cooperation: The mediator or facilitator helps parties to explore common ground, identify shared interests, and find mutually acceptable solutions.

Ensuring follow-through: After an agreement is reached, the mediator or facilitator may assist in establishing a plan of action and monitoring its implementation.

Mediation and facilitation can be particularly useful in complex or deeply entrenched conflicts, where the involvement of a neutral third party can facilitate resolution and improve relationships among parties.

Additional tips and techniques for conflict resolution

As you might have guessed, there are far more options to explore in managing conflicts. The five in the previous section were just the tip of the iceberg. There are various tips, practices, and techniques that can further enhance your conflict resolution skills. By incorporating these approaches into your conflict resolution toolkit you can navigate conflicts more effectively and foster positive outcomes, so it's time to refine those skills and contribute to a more harmonious and productive work environment. 

Separate people from the problem: Focus on the issue at hand rather than personalizing the conflict. By separating people from the problem, you can approach conflict resolution more objectively.

Foster a culture of feedback: Create an environment where feedback is valued and encouraged. Constructive feedback can address conflicts early on and prevent them from escalating.

Continuously learn and improve: Conflict resolution is a skill that can be honed over time. Seek opportunities for  professional development , attend workshops or training programs, and learn from real-world experiences.

Your conflict resolution journey

Congratulations! You've embarked on a journey to unlock the power of conflict resolution and forge a path toward a workplace that thrives on harmony and fosters resounding success. In this article, we've delved into the definition of conflict resolution, looked at key skills and examples, and recognized its importance in professional settings.

By developing strong conflict resolution skills, you're not only enhancing your ability to navigate conflicts effectively but are also becoming a steward of your own career progression. The value of these skills extends far beyond resolving individual conflicts; they empower you to excel as a professional, a team player, and a leader.

Moreover, by employing various conflict resolution strategies you become equipped with a diverse toolkit to address conflicts proactively and constructively.

Remember, conflict is a natural part of human interaction, but how we handle and resolve it sets us apart. By continuously honing your conflict resolution skills, seeking win-win solutions, and embracing a culture of open communication, you will not only enhance your professional growth but also contribute to a happier work environment.

So, embrace the challenges that conflict presents as opportunities for growth. View conflict resolution as a skill set that empowers you to navigate through obstacles, build stronger relationships, and drive success. By becoming a master of conflict resolution, you are taking charge of your own career progression and setting a shining example for others to follow.

Now, go forth with confidence, armed with the knowledge and skills to transform conflicts into stepping stones toward your professional success!

Make sure that your exceptional conflict resolution skills are shining through on your resume by taking advantage of our  free resume review !

Recommended reading:

Interpersonal Conflict: How to Manage it and Learn From it

Leverage People Skills to Improve Your Employability and Career Success

What Are Soft Skills? And How to Showcase Them on Your Resume

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What is conflict?

Causes of conflict in a relationship, how do you respond to conflict, conflict resolution, stress, and emotions, core skill 1: quick stress relief, core skill 2: emotional awareness, nonverbal communication and conflict resolution, more tips for managing and resolving conflict, conflict resolution skills.

Whatever the cause of disagreements and disputes at home or work, these skills can help you resolve conflict in a constructive way and keep your relationships strong and growing.

Conflict is a normal part of any healthy relationship. After all, two people can’t be expected to agree on everything, all the time. The key is not to fear or try to avoid conflict but to learn how to resolve it in a healthy way.

When conflict is mismanaged, it can cause great harm to a relationship, but when handled in a respectful, positive way, conflict provides an opportunity to strengthen the bond between two people. Whether you’re experiencing conflict at home, work, or school, learning these skills can help you resolve differences in a healthy way and build stronger, more rewarding relationships.

Conflict 101

• A conflict is more than just a disagreement. It is a situation in which one or both parties perceive a threat (whether or not the threat is real).
• Conflicts continue to fester when ignored. Because conflicts involve perceived threats to our well-being and survival, they stay with us until we face and resolve them.
• We respond to conflicts based on our perceptions of the situation, not necessarily to an objective review of the facts. Our perceptions are influenced by our life experiences, culture, values, and beliefs.
• Conflicts trigger strong emotions. If you aren’t comfortable with your emotions or able to manage them in times of stress, you won’t be able to resolve conflict successfully.
• Conflicts are an opportunity for growth. When you’re able to resolve conflict in a relationship, it builds trust. You can feel secure knowing your relationship can survive challenges and disagreements.

Conflict arises from differences, both large and small. It occurs whenever people disagree over their values, motivations, perceptions, ideas, or desires. Sometimes these differences appear trivial, but when a conflict triggers strong feelings, a deep personal need is often at the core of the problem. These needs can range from the need to feel safe and secure or respected and valued, to the need for greater closeness and intimacy.

Think about the opposing needs of a toddler and a parent. The child’s need is to explore, so venturing to the street or the cliff edge meets that need. But the parent’s need is to protect the child’s safety, a need that can only be met by limiting the toddler’s exploration. Since these needs are at odds, conflict arises.

The needs of each party play an important role in the long-term success of a relationship. Each deserves respect and consideration. In personal relationships, a lack of understanding about differing needs can result in distance, arguments, and break-ups. In the workplace, differing needs can result in broken deals, decreased profits, and lost jobs.

[Read: Tips for Building a Healthy Relationship]

When you can recognize conflicting needs and are willing to examine them with compassion and understanding, it can lead to creative problem solving, team building, and stronger relationships.

Speak to a Licensed Therapist

BetterHelp is an online therapy service that matches you to licensed, accredited therapists who can help with depression, anxiety, relationships, and more. Take the assessment and get matched with a therapist in as little as 48 hours.

Do you fear conflict or avoid it at all costs? If your perception of conflict comes from painful memories from early childhood or previous unhealthy relationships, you may expect all disagreements to end badly. You may view conflict as demoralizing, humiliating, or something to fear. If your early life experiences left you feeling powerless or out of control, conflict may even be traumatizing for you.

If you’re afraid of conflict, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. When you enter a conflict situation already feeling threatened, it’s tough to deal with the problem at hand in a healthy way. Instead, you’re more likely to either shut down or blow up in anger.

Healthy and unhealthy ways of managing and resolving conflict

Conflict triggers strong emotions and can lead to hurt feelings, disappointment, and discomfort. When handled in an unhealthy manner, it can cause irreparable rifts, resentments, and break-ups. But when conflict is resolved in a healthy way, it increases your understanding of the other person, builds trust, and strengthens your relationships.

If you are out of touch with your feelings or so stressed that you can only pay attention to a limited number of emotions, you won’t be able to understand your own needs. This will make it hard to communicate with others and establish what’s really troubling you. For example, couples often argue about petty differences—the way she hangs the towels, the way he slurps his soup—rather than what is  really bothering them.

The ability to successfully resolve conflict depends on your ability to:

• Manage stress quickly while remaining alert and calm. By staying calm, you can accurately read and interpret verbal and nonverbal communication.
• Control your emotions and behavior. When you’re in control of your emotions, you can communicate your needs without threatening, intimidating, or punishing others.
• Pay attention to the  feelings being expressed as well as the spoken words of others.
• Be aware of and respect differences. By avoiding disrespectful words and actions, you can almost always resolve a problem faster.

To successfully resolve a conflict, you need to learn and practice two core skills:

• Quick stress relief: the ability to quickly relieve stress in the moment.
• Emotional awareness: the ability to remain comfortable enough with your emotions to react in constructive ways, even in the midst of a perceived attack.

Being able to manage and relieve stress in the moment is the key to staying balanced, focused, and in control, no matter what challenges you face. If you don’t know how to stay centered and in control of yourself, you will become overwhelmed in conflict situations and unable to respond in healthy ways.

Psychologist Connie Lillas uses a driving analogy to describe the three most common ways people respond when they’re overwhelmed by stress:

Foot on the gas. An angry or agitated stress response. You’re heated, keyed up, overly emotional, and unable to sit still.

Foot on the brake. A withdrawn or depressed stress response. You shut down, space out, and show very little energy or emotion.

Foot on both gas and brake. A tense and frozen stress response. You “freeze” under pressure and can’t do anything. You look paralyzed, but under the surface you’re extremely agitated.

How stress affects conflict resolution

Stress interferes with the ability to resolve conflict by limiting your ability to:

• Accurately read another person’s body language .
• Hear what someone is really saying.
• Be aware of your own feelings.
• Be in touch with your own, deep-rooted needs.
• Communicate your needs clearly.

Is stress a problem for you?

You may be so used to feeling stressed that you’re not even aware you  are stressed. Stress may pose a problem in your life if you identify with the following:

• You often feel tense or tight somewhere in your body.
• You’re not aware of movement in your chest or stomach when you breathe.
• Conflict absorbs your time and attention.

Learn how to manage stress in the moment

One of the most reliable ways to rapidly reduce stress is by engaging one or more of your senses—sight, sound, taste, smell, touch—or through movement. You could squeeze a stress ball, smell a relaxing scent, taste a soothing cup of tea, or look at a treasured photograph. We all tend to respond differently to sensory input, often depending on how we respond to stress, so take some time to find things that are soothing to you. Read: Quick Stress Relief .

Emotional awareness is the key to understanding yourself and others. If you don’t know how or why you feel a certain way, you won’t be able to communicate effectively or resolve disagreements.

[Read: Improving Emotional Intelligence]

Although knowing your own feelings may sound simple, many people ignore or try to sedate strong emotions like anger, sadness, and fear. Your ability to handle conflict, however, depends on being connected to these feelings. If you’re afraid of strong emotions or if you insist on finding solutions that are strictly rational, your ability to face and resolve differences will be limited.

Why emotional awareness is a key factor in resolving conflict

Emotional awareness—the consciousness of your  moment-to-moment emotional experience—and the ability to manage all of your feelings appropriately, is the basis of a communication process that can resolve conflict.

Emotional awareness helps you to:

• Understand what is really troubling other people
• Understand yourself, including what is really troubling you
• Stay motivated until the conflict is resolved
• Communicate clearly and effectively
• Interest and influence others

Assessing your level of emotional awareness

The following quiz helps you assess your level of emotional awareness. Answer the following questions with:  almost never, occasionally, often, very often, or  almost always . There are no right or wrong responses, only the opportunity to become better acquainted with your emotional responses.

What kind of relationship do you have with your emotions?

• Do you experience feelings that flow, encountering one emotion after another as your experiences change from moment to moment?
• Are your emotions accompanied by physical sensations that you experience in places like your stomach or chest?
• Do you experience distinct feelings and emotions, such as anger, sadness, fear, and joy, which are evident in different facial expressions?
• Can you experience intense feelings that are strong enough to capture both your own attention and that of others?
• Do you pay attention to your emotions? Do they factor into your decision-making?

If any of these experiences are unfamiliar, your emotions may be “turned” down or even off. In either case, you may need help developing your emotional awareness. You can do this by using Helpguide’s free Emotional Intelligence Toolkit.

When people are in the middle of a conflict, the words they use rarely convey the issues at the heart of the problem. But by paying close attention to the other person’s nonverbal signals or “body language,” such as facial expressions, posture, gestures, and tone of voice, you can better understand what the person is really saying. This will allow you to respond in a way that builds trust, and gets to the root of the problem.

[Read: Nonverbal Communication and Body Language]

Your ability to accurately read another person depends on your own emotional awareness. The more aware you are of your own emotions, the easier it will be for you to pick up on the wordless clues that reveal what others are feeling. Think about what you are transmitting to others during conflict, and if what you say matches your body language. If you say “I’m fine,” but you clench your teeth and look away, then your body is clearly signaling you are anything but “fine.” A calm tone of voice, a reassuring touch, or an interested facial expression can go a long way toward relaxing a tense exchange.

You can ensure that the process of managing and resolving conflict is as positive as possible by sticking to the following guidelines:

Listen for what is felt as well as said. When you really listen, you connect more deeply to your own needs and emotions, and to those of other people. Listening also strengthens, informs, and makes it easier for others to hear you when it’s your turn to speak.

Make conflict resolution the priority rather than winning or “being right.” Maintaining and strengthening the relationship, rather than “winning” the argument, should always be your first priority. Be respectful of the other person and their viewpoint.

Focus on the present. If you’re holding on to grudges based on past conflicts, your ability to see the reality of the current situation will be impaired. Rather than looking to the past and assigning blame, focus on what you can do in the here-and-now to solve the problem.

Pick your battles. Conflicts can be draining, so it’s important to consider whether the issue is really worth your time and energy. Maybe you don’t want to surrender a parking space if you’ve been circling for 15 minutes, but if there are dozens of empty spots, arguing over a single space isn’t worth it.

Be willing to forgive. Resolving conflict is impossible if you’re unwilling or unable to forgive others. Resolution lies in releasing the urge to punish, which can serve only to deplete and drain your life.

Know when to let something go. If you can’t come to an agreement, agree to disagree. It takes two people to keep an argument going. If a conflict is going nowhere, you can choose to disengage and move on.

Using humor in conflict resolution

You can avoid many confrontations and resolve arguments and disagreements by communicating in a humorous way . Humor can help you say things that might otherwise be difficult to express without offending someone. However, it’s important that you laugh with the other person, not at them. When humor and play are used to reduce tension and anger, reframe problems, and put the situation into perspective, the conflict can actually become an opportunity for greater connection and intimacy.

More Information

• CR Kit - Covers causes of conflict, different conflict styles, and fair fighting guidelines to help you positively resolve disagreements. (Conflict Resolution Network)
• 12 Skills Summary - A 12-step conflict resolution training kit. (Conflict Resolution Network)
• Effective Communication - The art of listening in conflict resolution. (University of Maryland)
• 10.3 Causes and Outcomes of Conflict – Organizational Behavior . (n.d.). Retrieved May 25, 2022, from Link
• Başoğul, C., & Özgür, G. (2016). Role of Emotional Intelligence in Conflict Management Strategies of Nurses. Asian Nursing Research , 10(3), 228–233. Link
• Corcoran, Kathleen O’Connell, and Brent Mallinckrodt. “Adult Attachment, Self-Efficacy, Perspective Taking, and Conflict Resolution.” Journal of Counseling & Development 78, no. 4 (2000): 473–83. Link
• Yarnell, Lisa M., and Kristin D. Neff. “Self-Compassion, Interpersonal Conflict Resolutions, and Well-Being.” Self and Identity 12, no. 2 (March 1, 2013): 146–59. Link
• Tucker, Corinna Jenkins, Susan M. Mchale, and Ann C. Crouter. “Conflict Resolution: Links with Adolescents’ Family Relationships and Individual Well-Being.” Journal of Family Issues 24, no. 6 (September 1, 2003): 715–36. Link

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OPINION: Reviving India-China ties: China must take initiative by adopting a problem-solving attitude

The responsibility for improving relations between the two countries primarily rests with China

National Security Adviser Ajit Doval met with Chinese Foreign Minister and Special Representative Wang Yi on the sidelines of the BRICS National Security Advisers meeting in St. Petersburg on September 12, 2024.

While no concrete decisions were reached, both sides reaffirmed their commitment to finding an early resolution to the issues related to the Line of Actual Control (LAC) and emphasised the importance of stabilising and improving India-China relations.

This meeting is particularly noteworthy, as it marks the first time since 2019 that the two special representatives have met, underscoring the urgent need for progress in bilateral discussions.

The two Asian giants have had a troubled relationship since India’s Independence primarily due to Tibet and the boundary dispute. Having fought a war in 1962, there was detente in the relations post 1990s albeit with a huge underlying distrust. The situation along the border, however, has deteriorated since the Doklam crisis of 2017, resulting in a major military standoff in Ladakh since 2021.

ALSO READ:  India plays a crucial role in global world order, says CDS General Anil Chauhan

The talks between the military commanders at the highest level have not resulted in any improvement on the ground and both the armies have deployed for a long haul.

Despite the growing tension on the border, the trade between the countries has reached unprecedented levels wherein China has replaced the US as the biggest trading partner of India. In the $136 billion trade value, China enjoys a trade surplus of nearly $100 billion which has increased fourfold in the last decade.

Both nations recognise that this dichotomous relationship marked by rising economic ties and deteriorating diplomatic relations is unsustainable. The deep-rooted distrust and complex structural causes of conflict present significant challenges for the diplomats and political leaders of both countries.

READ MORE: China strengthening border infrastructure with new heliport just 20 km away from Arunachal Pradesh?

For relations to improve, China, as a larger and more influential nation, must take the initiative by adopting a problem-solving attitude and fostering meaningful dialogue. Rebuilding trust with India requires a significant shift in approach, which includes the following key elements.

Recognition of India’s global role

China should acknowledge India as a major global player with considerable influence, given its status as the most populous country, the largest democracy, and one of the fastest-growing economies. This acknowledgment should lead to a more pragmatic approach from Chinese policymakers.

Understand India’s stance

Chinese experts must grasp the current realities of India’s position. The 1998 nuclear tests, discussions related to the Nuclear Suppliers Group, and recent developments in Doklam and Ladakh should signal to them that they are now engaging with a more determined and resilient India than they might have encountered in the past.

Reassess historical perspectives

Mao Zedong and Zhou Enlai perceived the colonial legacy of India and the Indian National Congress as antagonistic to China, which led to their mistrust of former prime minister Jawaharlal Nehru. Unfortunately, this skepticism persists in the broader Chinese mindset. There remains a belief that India is acting as a proxy for Western powers against China. It is crucial to reassess and move beyond this outdated perspective and see India as a friend.

Understand Indian perspective on Tibet

China’s forcible occupation of Tibet and the breach of its promised sovereignty are unjustifiable. However, China should move beyond its suspicion that India is undermining its interests in Tibet. India was among the first to recognize the People's Republic of China in 1949 without preconditions.

Moreover, India accepted China's occupation of Tibet and voluntarily relinquished the special rights it inherited from the British. The asylum granted to the Dalai Lama by India is a purely humanitarian act, demonstrating India's special historical relations with Tibet. Given this background, there is no reason to suspect that India would act against China's interests in Tibet.

Base claims on historical evidence

China’s claims to Indian territory, including Ladakh and Arunachal Pradesh, lack historical basis. The most substantial discussions on the boundary dispute between the two nations occurred from June to December 1960. During these talks, numerous discrepancies were noted in the maps and documents provided by the Chinese side, which also changed their positions frequently. For these discussions to be productive, China must present authentic data and documentation rather than obscuring the issue.

Altering place names in Arunachal Pradesh will only exacerbate the already complex situation.

ALSO READ:  Understanding 'Project 33', the US Navy's ambitious plan to outpace China by 2027

The responsibility for improving relations between the two countries primarily rests with China. To achieve this, China must demonstrate true statesmanship by shifting its attitude and perspective toward India, thereby earning the trust of the Indian public. A more constructive approach is essential, one that addresses contentious issues with honesty and transparency.

Both nations stand to gain significantly from enhanced diplomatic relations, which would foster greater stability and cooperation in the region.

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How to Answer Conflict Interview Questions: Examples & Samples

An interview for a new role allows you to display your experience, aptitudes, and capabilities. Interview questions can be cumbersome, especially conflict questions. With the proper training, you’ll understand how to answer these questions effectively and prevent conflict in the workplace down the road.  

When interviewing for your new role, a hiring manager may ask you questions about your conflict resolution skills in the workplace. According to research by the Society for Human Resource Management ( SHRM ), 76% of organizations use behavioral interviews as a part of their hiring process. The following examples can help you answer conflict interview questions successfully. 

Image by Yan Krukau on Pexels

Conflict Interview Questions

Conflict interview questions evaluate how you react to and settle altercations at work. Employers want to know how you handle tension and your capacity to respectfully resolve confrontations with others.

How you respond to questions about conflict could make or break your interview. It’s important to communicate your abilities and show that you’re prepared. Here are some common questions that interviewers ask and how you can respond assertively:

How Do You Handle Conflict?

A report by CPP Global found that 85% of employees deal with conflict at work, which costs around $359 billion annually due to lost productivity. Everyone has different personalities and ideas, and those differences can sometimes lead to conflict.

Responding successfully can show employers that you can effectively handle these situations. It’s always important to be honest while also displaying your strengths. 

Sample Response to “How Do You Handle Conflict?”

“When I have to resolve a conflict, I remember that different people have different opinions. I can handle conflict well because I collaborate with others to resolve the matter, trying to ensure everybody wins. Sometimes, I can become more reserved when I feel I’m not being heard. However, I am managing this by creating a space for everyone to openly communicate their suggestions and carefully consider my words so that I can convey my ideas. ”

The STAR Method

The STAR method helps you structure your answer to behavioral questions with real-life examples. These examples should demonstrate how you handle complex altercations and find positive outcomes.

STAR is an acronym for:

Resolving Conflicts With Coworkers

A STAR method response to a question regarding conflict with coworkers may sound like this:

• Situation: In my last role as a customer service rep, a team member and I disagreed about how to address a tricky case. The customer received a damaged product and was understandably frustrated.
• Task: Although my colleague considered strictly following the company’s return policy, I suggested that we honor that customer’s loyalty by making an exception. We both agreed that our main goal was to resolve the issues so that the customer left with a positive experience. 
• Action: Since we agreed, I suggested that we each lay out our perspectives clearly and calmly, so we fully understood each other’s points. Once we discussed both approaches, we collaborated on a new solution. We offered the customer a replacement immediately and provided a small gift card as a thank-you for their loyalty.
• Result: The customer noted that they were pleased with the outcome and left a positive review about how our customer service went the extra mile for her. This showed how I could work with others to create quick and positive solutions while strengthening my relationship with my colleagues. Everyone learned how to approach this conflict better in the future.

Demonstrating teamwork, problem-solving, remaining calm, and communication skills can help you succeed in your interview using the star method. 

Handling Conflicts With Superiors

When asked to describe a situation where you disagreed with someone and how you handled it, here’s an example of an answer:

• Situation: In my last role as a marketing coordinator, my supervisor introduced a new brand awareness campaign. I had concerns about the plan’s execution because he wasn’t going to be involved in the day-to-day. My concern was the plan would divide our customer engagement efforts and waste valuable resources.
• Task: I needed to address my concerns while honoring the vision of my superiors. My goal was to find a solution with my boss that was in the best interest of the company’s objectives and balanced his strategic vision with the practical aspects of our day-to-day operations.
• Action: I scheduled a one-on-one meeting with my supervisor, where I first acknowledged the benefits of his proposed strategy, and we discussed his clear vision for the brand. Then, I voiced my apprehensions about how certain elements of the plan might overwhelm the team’s capacity and current projects. I provided specific examples to illustrate challenges and suggested other strategies to achieve our goals while leveraging our team’s resources. We had an open, productive conversation, shared our opinions, and discussed the negatives and advantages.
• Result: After our discussion, my manager modified the plan and incorporated some of my suggestions. We implemented a revised strategy that aligned with the team’s workflow, saved us time, and reduced mistakes. The experience strengthened our working relationship and led to better outcomes. My manager thanked me for my initiative, and we surpassed our performance marks.

Showing the ability to thoughtfully address concerns with a superior, finding a way to prioritize the company’s goals, and contributing a practical perspective that improves results can help you succeed in your interview using the STAR Method.

Handling Conflicts On Teams

If a hiring manager asks you to give an example of a time you faced a conflict while working on a team, you could respond using the STAR method: 

• Situation: In my previous role on a product development team, I worked on a main project with a closing deadline. One of my teammates missed key milestones, which caused the rest of us to work more. This imbalance caused delays and put the project’s success at risk.
• Task: Morale began to drop as we struggled to meet deadlines, so we knew we had to resolve the conflict, address the problem, and improve team dynamics. 
• Action: I spoke with my struggling teammate privately to explain the impact of his absence. He shared that he had too much on his plate and felt overwhelmed. After hearing this, I suggested we work together and he agreed. We reorganized the team’s workload, distributed tasks on an availability basis, and adjusted our schedule to help our teammates. 
• Result: With these changes, we empowered our teammates to contribute more, team dynamics improved, and we streamlined our workflow. We met our project deadlines and started exceeding performance expectations. 

Clear communication that finds solutions and considers the challenges each party faces strengthens teamwork and efficiency. Handling conflicts with empathy and creative problem-solving skills can enhance any team’s success. 

Managing Conflicts You’ve Faced At Work

Facing challenges can help employees thrive in the workplace. This is especially true when they collaborate, share ideas, and solve problems. Here’s how you could answer questions about how you handle conflicts in the workplace:

• Situation: In another role, I noticed a coworker bypassed authorizations for shipping goods to clients.  I knew these authorizations helped us keep records. They also ensured compliance with the company, which could mean trouble in an audit.  
• Task: Since this process could lead to legal ramifications, I knew I had to handle the concern. My goal was to make sure my coworker understood the importance of adhering to the protocols to prevent future risks.
• Action: I approached my coworker directly and calmly asked if they were aware of the policy. My coworker was dismissive and emphasized that their ways saved time. I explained the coming consequences for the company and stressed the importance of compliance. Realizing the seriousness of the situation, I spoke with my manager, explained what occurred, and emphasized how I attempted to address it. 
• Result: My manager referred it to HR and my coworker began following the correct protocols. The company implemented a better tracking system so all packages were authorized, and my coworker kept her job. 

Attempting to address the situation reinforced the importance of compliance. Escalating important issues when necessary protects the company and improves protocols. Using the STAR method requires integrity and demonstrating all the many ways you can resolve conflicts. 

Demonstrating How To Reclaim Workplace Harmony

Conflicts in the workplace may lead to unresolved tensions. These tensions often drag down teams, waste leadership potential, and harm the company. It doesn’t have to be this way. Training for managers and supervisors can help you resolve conflict.

Imagine a workplace where conflicts become opportunities to constructively collaborate and thrive—a place where each team member feels heard and respected and comes to work energized to achieve extraordinary results. 

A personalized consultation can help you design effective conflict management strategies for any workplace challenge. By being prepared with conflict resolution training sessions, you can equip yourself with the knowledge and skills to manage any conflicts on your new team. The right approach can unlock the door to your new job by showing how you can create a more harmonious and productive work environment.

About the Author: Editor's Choice

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Social Story: Solving Problems Together | Social Skills | Conflict Resolution

Subject: Special educational needs

Age range: 5 - 11

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Social Story: Solving Problems Together

Problem-solving amongst peers is an important life skill, but is often challenging for our students. Like any other skill, problem solving requires practice in order to get better at it. This social story helps students to develop healthy boundaries and relationships with their peers, and to navigate how to problem-solve and engage in conversation without creating conflict or negative feelings.

This 12-page social story conveys these themes using practical examples, engaging visuals, and developmentally appropriate language. It is best suited to K-6, and special education settings. We hope this social story helps you, help the children you work with!

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Statistics > Machine Learning

Title: think twice before you act: improving inverse problem solving with mcmc.

Abstract: Recent studies demonstrate that diffusion models can serve as a strong prior for solving inverse problems. A prominent example is Diffusion Posterior Sampling (DPS), which approximates the posterior distribution of data given the measure using Tweedie's formula. Despite the merits of being versatile in solving various inverse problems without re-training, the performance of DPS is hindered by the fact that this posterior approximation can be inaccurate especially for high noise levels. Therefore, we propose \textbf{D}iffusion \textbf{P}osterior \textbf{MC}MC (\textbf{DPMC}), a novel inference algorithm based on Annealed MCMC to solve inverse problems with pretrained diffusion models. We define a series of intermediate distributions inspired by the approximated conditional distributions used by DPS. Through annealed MCMC sampling, we encourage the samples to follow each intermediate distribution more closely before moving to the next distribution at a lower noise level, and therefore reduce the accumulated error along the path. We test our algorithm in various inverse problems, including super resolution, Gaussian deblurring, motion deblurring, inpainting, and phase retrieval. Our algorithm outperforms DPS with less number of evaluations across nearly all tasks, and is competitive among existing approaches.

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